September 9, 2008 - Elections - The Retired Guys Drill Team - More Videos
Monday morning - the day after our Prime Minister called an election - overheard at Tim's while tossing back a double-double.
"How are you going to vote?" Vote where? I'm not American" "No, our election" We have an election?" "Ya, Harper called it yesterday." Crap - you know what that means?" What?" We'll have all those annoying political commercials on all our TV stations - they're bad enough on the American stations, now we have to have them on ours."
So, with complete indifference, Canada goes to the polls - no whoop-em-up conventions with cascading balloons and boisterous, party-loving delegates - just a brief announcement from the PM calling for an election that starts a year after the beginning of the US election campaign and will end a month before the conclusion of the US election campaign - please no fuss - play nice - cheer if you must but apologize afterwards for disturbing your neighbour - boring maybe, but it's the Canadian way.
But it wasn't always so polite, law-abiding and dull.
Back in the early Canadian voting years, our politicians eagerly participated in what they call "treating" -supplying money, food and booze in exchange for votes plus the vote earning practise of "Personation" - voting under someone else's name.
"Another practice was "importing" voters from the United States for election day - In 1901 in Ontario, the Lake Superior Corporation (later the Algoma Steel Company) used a tugboat to bring in workers from Sault Sainte-Marie, Michigan, to vote in the place of absent or deceased miners."
I wonder if I could get away with bussing my retired Florida neighbours up to pitch-vote for the absent and deceased in my riding?
It's interesting to note however, voter turnout in the Canadian 2006 general election was 64.7% - while the US election in 2004 was 56.69%
Also, when you review voter stats in both countries the major portion of those who do vote are in the 50 plus age group - in both countries an historical review of voters reveals far fewer people under the age of 25 are voting than did 3 or 4 decades ago - not a good thing - it will be interesting to see if that trend continues, especially in the US with a young guy going up against the old guy.
Meanwhile, retired buddy Jim Hill sent in this video along with the comment - "If only Canadian Elections could be this much fun."
Thanks to semi-retired buddy Bill Ozard for sending me the following VIDEO - THE RETIRED GUYS DRILL TEAM
I was mentioning
my retired Florida neighbours - thanks to Tom Adams for the following list of perks for
those of us over the age of 65.
Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
No one expects you to run~ anywhere.
People call at 9 pm and ask, 'Did I wake you???'
People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
Things you buy now won't wear out.
You can eat dinner at 4 pm.
You can live without sex but not your glasses.
You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.
You sing along with elevator music.
Your eyes won't get much worse.
Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.
You can't remember who sent you this list! And you notice these are all in Big Print for your convenience.
You should forward this to anyone you can remember!
Tom also sent in this fun video:
Thanks to retired buddy Elma Hickman for this entry's kicker:
When Joe, a nice man married for over 50 years died, his wife, Myrtle was devastated. A couple of months later, Myrtle also died.
Once in heaven, Myrtle, anxiously looked for Joe. Suddenly, behind a cloud, she could clearly see him. She ran towards him, calling his name: 'Joe. darling.. '
Joe said: 'Hold your horses woman, and don't 'darling' me. The deal was very clear!! 'Until death do us part!'
Now let's get working on our creative retirement job - start your research here -
(Go to URL)
To reference this entry please copy the url in this link:
(Permalink)
September 15, 2008 - Stop the Prayers at least the Email kind - The Aged holiday - Another Freebie - Retiring the 87th
Right off the top - thanks to not-yet-retired buddy Penny Shepard for sending in this advice from Snopes.com - stop with those Email prayers
Any time you see an E-Mail that says Forward this on to '10' of your friends or you'll get bad luck, good luck, sign this petition or you'll get bad luck, good luck or whatever, it almost always has an E-Mail tracker program attached that tracks the cookies and E-Mails of those folks you forward to.
What does this mean you may ask???
The host sender is getting a copy each time it gets forwarded and then is able to get lists of 'active' E-Mails to use in SPAM E-Mails, or sell to other spammers.
Almost all E-Mails that ask you to add your name and forward on to others are similar to that mass letter years ago that asked people to send business cards to the little kid in Florida who wanted to break the Guinness Book of Records for the most cards. All it was, and all any of this type of E-Mail is, is a way to get names and 'cookie ' tracking information for telemarketers and spammers - - to validate active E-Mail accounts for their own profitable purposes.
So do your friends and family members a GREAT favour by STOPPING those 'Send to 10 friends in the next 5 minutes to receive a great gift in the next 24 hours...'
If you have been sending out (FORWARDING) the above kinds of E-Mail, now you know why you get so much SPAM!
Do yourself and your friends a huge favour and STOP adding your name(s) to those type s of listings regardless how inviting they might sound!
Today is a National holiday in Japan - Keiro no Hi - Respect for the Aged Day -great idea but I hate the title.
I admit I’m getting there - 80 is fairly high on the longevity scale - but far from "the aged" - how about Respect for the Ageless Day - or Respect for Those-Who-Have-Had-a-Lot-of-Birthdays Day
Call it what you will, this is one national holiday that should be adapted by the rest of the world. On this day, Japanese media take the opportunity to feature seniors, reporting on the population and highlighting the oldest people in the country - so many stories to be told and lessons to be learned.
Here’s an amazing stat - In Okinawa, centenarian ratios may be the world's highest at approximately 50 per 100,000 population representing 740 centenarians in a population of 1.3 million of which 90% are women.
Even in a country where they live longer than anywhere else - the guys still go first.
Check out this video - The secret to Living Longer
Thanks to retired buddy Elma Hickman for sending in what is reported to be a transcript of an exchange between Citibank and a relative of a recently deceased woman.
Here's the story - a lady died this past January, and Citibank billed her for February and March for their annual service charges on her credit card, and added late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00 when she died, but now somewhere around $60.00. A family member placed a call to Citibank.
Here is the exchange :
Family Member: 'I am calling to tell you she died back in January.' Citibank : 'The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply.' Family Member : 'Maybe, you should turn it over to collections.' Citibank 'Since it is two months past due, it already has been.'
Family Member : So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?' Citibank : 'Either report her account to frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!' Family Member : 'Do you think God will be mad at her?' >br>Citibank: 'Excuse me?' Family Member : 'Did you just get what I was telling you - the part about her being dead?' Citibank : 'Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor.'
Supervisor gets on the phone:
Family Member : 'I'm calling to tell you, she died back in January with a $0 balance.' Citibank : 'The account was never closed and late fees and charges still apply.' Family Member : 'You mean you want to collect from her estate?' Citibank : (Stammer) 'Are you her lawyer?' Family Member : 'No, I'm her great nephew.' (Lawyer info was given) Citibank: 'Could you fax us a certificate of death?' Family Member : 'Sure.' (Fax number was given)
After they get the fax :
Citibank : 'Our system just isn't setup for death. I don't know what more I can do to help.' Family Member : 'Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. She won't care.' Citibank: 'Well, the late fees and charges do still apply.' (What is wrong with these people?!?) Family Member : 'Would you like her new billing address?' Citibank : 'That might help.' Family Member : ' Odessa Memorial Cemetery , Highway 129, Plot Number 69.' Citibank : 'Sir, that's a cemetery !' Family Member : 'And what do you do with dead people on your planet???
I have another KACHING retirement job idea for those of you who fall into the service sellers category - those who, during their working years, built careers as Painters - Home maintenance providers - Graphic Designers - Barbers - Personal trainers - Landscapers - Caregivers - Photographers - the list goes on and on - get yourself a website to not only promote your service but also to bring in an extra source of retirement income via Goggle AdSense, affiliate programmes, Ebooks and so forth, - and before you say nay-nay to the net - it’s not that tough - trust me, and here’s a no cost way to find out.
This easy read manual will show you how you can build a cost-and-time-effective presence on the Net even if your web techie knowledge is currently limited to turning on your computer and staring at the screen wondering what to do next - that’s the way it was for me a few years back.
During my working years I called them my "airport novels" - in Retirement I call them my "under the maple tree novels" - those easy-read, page turners written by gifted individuals and featuring absorbing plot twists, crackling dialogue and appealing characters - be they evil or upright.
I’m a crime guy, therefore I am well acquainted with James Patterson’s Alex Cross and Lindsay Boxer and the rest of her murder club members - Michael Connelly’s Harry Bosch - Janet Evanovich’s bounty hunter Stephanie Plum - and, the best of the best - Ed Mcbain’s Steve Carella.
However, to illustrate how far out of the literary loop I am - I didn‘t know, until last week, that Carella, Meyer Meyer, Bert Kling, Ollie Weeks, Cotton Hawes, Andy Parker and the rest of the imperfect but dedicated detective squad at the 87th Precinct are now retired - not that they wanted to be - but their creator, Ed McBain, the gifted alter ego of Evan Hunter, passed away back in July 05 - he was 78.
What a loss - this man was one of the most creative, whitest, and prolific writers of crime fiction - his characters are as human as your next door neighbour - but for me it was his crackling dialogue - as real as any you’ll hear in any pub or locker room.
So learning late about the retirement of the detective squad at the 87th - I have added another item to my Bucket List - read all 57 Ed McBain books dealing with the 87th precinct - in order - as of this writing, I have 46 to go - Join me -
Thanks to retired Buddy Sharon Raycraft for sending the following - What 'pissed off' really looks like------When I get out, someone's gonna die …
And Finally our kicker - supplied by retired buddy Elma Hickman:
Wally's Wedding Night
At 85 years of age, Wally married Anne, a lovely 25 year old. Since her new husband is so old, Anne decides that after their wedding she and Wally should have separate bedrooms, because she is concerned that her new but aged husband may overexert himself if they spend the entire night together.
After the wedding festivities Anne prepares herself for bed and the expected 'knock' on the door. Sure enough the knock comes, the door opens and there is Wally, her 85 year old groom, ready for action and they unite as one.
All goes well, Wally takes leave of his bride, and she prepares to go to sleep. After a few minutes, Anne hears another knock on her bedroom door, and it's Wally - again he is ready for more 'action' - Somewhat surprised, Anne consents for more coupling. When the newlyweds are done, Wally kisses his bride, bids her a fond goodnight and leaves.
She is set to go to sleep again, but, aha you guessed it..... Wally is back again, rapping on the door, and is as fresh as a 25-year-old, ready for more 'action.' - once again they enjoy each other.
But as Wally gets set to leave again, his young bride says to him, 'I am thoroughly impressed that at your age you can perform so well and so often. I have been with guys less than a third of your age who were only good once. You are truly a great lover, Wally.'
Wally, somewhat embarrassed, turns to Anne and says: ....…'You mean I was here already?'
The moral of the story:
Don't be afraid of getting old, senior moments have advantages.
