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Retirement News Home : November 2007

November 1, 2007 - A "Wow" Moment - What's Your Passion - Shipwrecked and Other Stuff

For the first time during these annual snowbird trips south, I had a "WOW" moment - maybe in the past I was too focused on just "getting there" - perhaps it's my age and I realize that these trips are numbered so I'm taking more time to see rather than just look - whatever - but, it was something to behold.
It happened on State Highway 19 in West Virginia - as the car came out of a curve we drove into this spectacular world of colour - as far as the eye could see - valley after valley - brilliant reds and soft yellows with flicks of various shades of brown and orange all blended into a dark green carpet of pines - the entire scene lighted by the soft luminosity of a late afternoon sun. - the cars ahead of us reacted the same way - we all slowed down and it was like a parade as most of the cars turned off into an observation parking lot - this scene was special and wouldn't you know it - my digital camera batteries were dead.
However, I don't need a picture to remind me - I have it captured in the theater of my mind - ready to screen the next time I start feeling the world is going to hell in a hand-basket.
But I tell you one thing - after witnessing the beauty of that day - don't tell me - "There ain't no God."
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Catching up on my Email - this one from retired buddy Jim Hill - reads as follows:
Boomer:
READ THIS FIRST THEN CLICK THE LINK AT THE BOTTOM AND WATCH!
If you do not have tears welling as you watch and listen to this man, book yourself into a cemetery.....you are dead mate!!!
Jim
This is a story about a guy, a guy like most of us, common, questioning his existence, measuring himself to others, never believing in his abilities or his worth.
Then one day, his passion outgrew his fears as he stepped onto a stage, a stage that took him to a place beyond his self imposed prison.
Watch the faces of the judges as this guy walks out on the stage. You can almost see what they're thinking as they pre-judge this guy based on his looks and the fact that he's a cell phone salesman.
Maybe this guy stopped believing in what people told him for so many years and ultimately started listening to his passion.
Click here for another "WOW" moment.
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And while on the subject of working on something you're passionate about - Statistics Canada figures show that baby boomers accounted for 54 per cent of self-employed workers in Canada in 2004, up from 48.5 per cent in 2000 - I'm sure the stats are about the same in other countries.
An Ipsos Reid survey on operating a small business in retirement conducted for BMO Financial Group has found the main reason retirees decide to start their own businesses is for the money, followed by the desire to fill their spare time, mental stimulation, to satisfy a curiosity or build a skill set.
Almost half of retirees said they planned to start some kind of home-based business followed by a consulting business, retail, gardening and landscaping, an animal-related, hospitality or a food-related business.
Paul Clark, senior vice president of small business banking with TD Bank Financial Group, cautions retirees with this advise - ""Whatever business you're going into, you have to have a passion for it - small business can have a lot of ups and downs, and you have to be willing and ready to ride them out."
One of the key ways to exercise your brain is to learn a new skill such as building an online retirement job with your own website - as mark Stibich, Ph.D explains - "Learning a new skill challenges many parts of the brain. Not only does your brain have to understand the instructions for the new skill but it also has to learn new motions, program new muscle memories and remember everything."
If you are computer capable, building an online business is a worthy challenge, but if you start out from scratch, as I did, this creative exercise keeps the brain working in overdrive making each success even more satisfying.
But, and this an important "but" - don't go it alone - take all the help you can get. Computer capable or computer klutz - go with Site Built It, as I did - they supply the roadmap and take care of all the techie stuff while you handle the creative, brain-exercising part.
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More Email - from retired buddy Dianne Quinn - Try this, it's totally freaky... click on this site
Picture of the Week
California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger is chalking up a lot of brownie points from folks on how he handled the fire disaster in that State - when a reporter asked him how he was able to get everyone coordinated so quickly the governor, an Austrian-born former champion bodybuilder, said:
"I spent a lot of time in sports, and so I've learned a lot of lessons in sports. One of them of course is discipline, and positive thinking, visualizing your goals, and having to be absolutely convinced that you can accomplish your goal. And also one of the things I learned is follow-through ... . It's one thing to get out of the gate the first three days, but it's another thing to get through the finish line successfully."
Pin that one up on your wall.
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And finally - this story:
A retired corporate executive, now a widower, decided to take a vacation. He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank.
He found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts. After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore. In disbelief, he asks, "Where did you come from - how did you get here?"
She replies, "I rowed from the other side of the island. I landed here when my cruise ship sank."
"Amazing - You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with you."
"Oh, this thing - I made the boat out of raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm branches, and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree."
"But, where did you get the tools?"
"Oh that was no problem - on the south side of the island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into ductile iron.....I used that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware. Let's row over to my place.
The retired guy is overwhelmed. After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat. Before him is a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white. While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck.
As they walk into the house, she says casually, "It's not much, but I call it home. Sit down, please. Would you like a drink?"
"No! No thank you - I can't take another drop of coconut juice."
"It's not coconut juice - I have a still. How would you like a Pina Colada?"
Trying to hide his continued amazement, the retired guy accepts, and they sit down on her couch to talk.
After they have exchanged their stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the bathroom cabinet."
No longer questioning anything, the man goes into the bathroom. There, in the cabinet, a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel mechanism. "This woman is amazing - What next?"
When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but vines, strategically positioned, and smelling faintly of gardenias.
She beckons for him to sit down next to her. "Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've been out here for many months. You've been lonely. There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing right now, something you've been longing for?"
She stares into his eyes.
He can't believe what he's hearing. "You mean..."he swallows excitedly and tears start to form in his eyes. "Don't tell me you've built a Golf Course?"
Have a great weekend - hope to see you again on Monday - and don't forget to work on your creative retirement job - start here - (Go to URL)

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November 5, 2007 - Philosophers of the Driveway - Snowball - Positive Points and Other Stuff

In a recent column, Garrison Keillor, he of Prairie Home Companion broadcast fame, took me back to my childhood years when he wrote about a world populated by folks he calls - the driveway philosophers:
" those quiet gentle godly men with husky voices who leaned against cars and talked quietly about manly things which, for them, included.
Cheap things that are better than expensive ones.
The peculiarities of neighbours.
The relative merits of makes of cars.
Amazing coincidences in everyday life.
The art of raising strawberries.
The absurdities of urban life.
Road trips, past and future.
Keillor clarifies what those of us in top echelon age group often reminisce about - the great days of the driveway philosophers:
"What they say is that life is made up of a richness of small things and you need to keep them all in perspective. Read the Bible but don't forget to cover your strawberry beds or change your oil.
Go places, see things. Don't get carried away. Moderation. Don't get mad. Don't make things more complicated than they are. If you're too busy to stand around and talk, you're not living right.
Some of us veered away from their example and galloped into the stone canyons of careerism, which has warped us somewhat.
We are expected to give up our lives for work. We have a tendency to obsess and orate and that is something the driveway philosophers didn't go in for. They were a chorus, not an audience, and they spoke softly and contrapuntally of the wonders of the world, the benefits of pruning and mulching, the qualities of apples, the science of forecasting winter by observing woolly caterpillars, the plans for flooding the back yard to make a hockey rink, the difficulties of growing roses, the trials and tribulations of plumbing."
Keillor claims these driveway philosophers can still be found if you look hard enough.
I found a legion of them - they're retired and living in Florida - just don't go outside the retirement park gates - it's another world out there.
In case you haven't had a chance to listen to a Prairie Home Companion broadcast, or you failed to see the movie starring Keillor and Meryl Streep and therefore haven't a clue what they're all about - here's one from their archives - grab a coffee, put your feet up on your computer desk - and just go with it - time well spent.
Here's how their website described this February 3, 2007 broadcast:
"Producing an eighth Joke Show is a lofty goal, our interns have lost weight (and some hair) over the last few weeks, but they actually found some funny jokes we haven't used in the past, so here goes nothing.
This week on A Prairie Home Companion, it's jokes, jokes, and more jokes. Jokes read by professional radio actors, willing to sacrifice their dignity for the greater good of giggling, guffawing, and groaning.
The Guy's All-Star Shoe Band will be joined by Dan Newton and Andy Stein, with a new batch of humorous songs, plus we'll have a surprise lineup of comic re-enforcements to help deliver the massive payload of punch lines.
If you're someone who is easily offended by PG-13 humor, please don't send us complaints, just tune into the "Murder, She Wrote" marathon on the Biography channel instead."
This takes a FREE RealAudio player.
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My thanks to new retirement News Blog contributor Paul Wedge for this fun bit of video starring Snowball, a sulphur crested Eleanora cockatoo who has a thing for the Back Street Boys - you go bird
This quickie from contributor Bernice Dini who asks - What affectionate nickname do you have for your spouse?
A little old lady is walking around in a supermarket calling out, "Crisco, Crisssssssco!"
Soon an assistant manager approaches and says, "Ma'am, the Crisco is in aisle 3."
The old lady replies, "Oh, I'm not looking for the cooking stuff. I'm calling my husband - an old guy - he wanders off sometimes - he's in here somewhere."
The clerk is astonished. "Your husband's name is Crisco?"
The old lady answers, "Oh, no. I only call him that when we're out in public."
"I see," said the clerk. "What do you call him at home?"
"Lard ass."
Another creative commercial - Why Men Have Sheds
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My web wanderings came across a piece from the Family Service Department of the Chautauqua Region Mental Health Therapist who listed the following ideas that can help with the development of a more positive attitude - good stuff here.
Use humor to soften the impact of the encountered problems. Laughter changes the chemicals in the brain encouraging more optimistic feelings.
Focus on and invest more time in the positives in life such as people, situations, events and activities where good feelings are experienced.
Get rid of life's clutter - whether it be those unused, nonessential possessions or the multiple commitments or involvements, simplify life.
Stay busy with necessary tasks. Set goals for and keep focused on them until they are achieved.
Exercise. This is another activity that has an immediate benefit of boosting those mood-enhancing brain chemicals and also the longer-term benefit of providing overall better health.
Refuse to assume responsibility for other people's problems.
Limit involvement in the negative drama of others.
Get rid of life's clutter - whether it be those unused, nonessential possessions or the multiple commitments or involvements, simplify life.
Use spiritual resources.
Engage in a special hobby on a regular basis. Recreation is an important part of effective stress management.
Share a positive attitude to others - that is, do something nice for someone else.
Take care of yourself, not only your physical health but also becoming content with who you are and how you appear to others. Work on feeling good about yourself.
Visualize positive outcomes. Get as much detail in mind's eye until it ''feels'' real.
A reminder - the Positive Thinking Chapter on the home website is now interactive - you can build your own webpage and share your positive, life changing experiences and help motivate others.
You can comment on Positive - Creative Visualization - Affirmations and Quotations - Handling Stress - and a wide range of other positive life alerting subjects. Your story and suggestions could help others turn their lives around.
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And finally - An elderly married couple scheduled their annual medical examinations on the same day so they could travel together. After the examination, the doctor said to the elderly man: "You appear to be in good health. Do you have any medical concerns that you would like to discuss with me?"
"In fact, I do", said the man. "After I have sex with my wife for the first time, I am usually hot and sweaty, and then, after having sex with my wife the second time, I am usually cold and chilly." "This is very interesting - let me do some research and get back to you."
After examining the elderly lady, the doctor said: "Everything appears to be fine. Do you have any medical concerns that you would like to discuss with me?"
The lady replied that she had no questions nor concerns.
The doctor then asked: "your husband had an unusual concern. He claims that he is usually hot and sweaty after having sex the first time with you and then cold and chilly after the second time. Do you know why?"
"Oh that old coot! - That's because the first time is usually in July and the second time is usually in December!"
Don't forget to work on your retirement job - start researching here - (Go to URL)

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November 8, 2007 - Ichabod knows the Secret - The 70's

He's retired - stands well over six feet - he's as thin as a thermometer - he's the only one I've ever seen who wears a shirt and tie to go bowling and with the bright red braces holding up his pants he looks like a redneck version of Ichabod Crane and it's obvious that everyone in his senior citizen bowling league loves him and I think I know why - he smiles and laughs a great deal and his "my way" attitude acts like a switch that automatically changes the mood of those around him.
A smile can do that - even a forced one when you don't really feel like it can motivate you to smile for real.
And observing this bowling Ichabod I would bet the farm that he doesn't give much, if any, thought to growing old so he'll probably live longer than the norm because of his manner and obvious positive attitude .
Stats back that up - research shows that how you perceive aging affects how long you will live. In a study of 660 people, those with more positive perceptions of their own aging lived an average of 7.5 years longer. This effect remained after other factors such as age, gender, income, loneliness and health status were controlled.
What we need in this world is more folks like Ichabod the bowler.
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And while on the subject of growing old - check this out - do you remember?
My thanks to retired buddies Kathy and Craig Olson for sending the following.
Last weekend while I put an exhaust fan in the ceiling, we found something under the insulation. What we found was this:
A JC Penney catalog from 1977. It's not often blog fodder just falls in my lap, but sweet potatoes this was two solid inches of it, right there for the taking.
Also, I am totally getting this for my bathroom:
There's plenty more home furnishings where those came from, however I'm not going to bore you with that. Instead, I'm going to bore you with something else. The clothes - The clothes are fantastic.
Here's how to get your a$$ kicked in elementary school:
Just look at that belt. It's like a boob-job for your pants. He probably needed help just to lift it into place. The belt loops have to be three inches long - way to pull them up to your armpits, grandpa.
Here's how to get your a$$ kicked in high school:
This kid looks like he's pretending to be David Soul, who is pretending to be a cop who is pretending to be a pimp that everyone knows is really an undercover cop. Who is pretending to be 15.
Here's how to get your a$$ kicked on the golf course:
This "all purpose jumpsuit" is, according to the description, equally appropriate for playing golf or simply relaxing around the house. Personally, I can't see wearing this unless you happen to be relaxing around your cell in D-block . Even then, the only reason you should put this thing on is because the warden made you, and as a one-piece, it's slightly more effective as a deterrent against being asked to dance.
Here's how to get your a$$ kicked pretty much anywhere:
If you look at that picture quickly, it looks like Mr. Bob "No-pants" Saget has his hand in the other guy's pocket. In this case, he doesn't, although you can tell just by looking at them that it's happened - or if it hasn't happened it will. Oh yes. It will. As soon as he puts down his matching coffee cup.
How to get your a$$ kicked in a meeting:
If you wear this suit and don't sell used cars for a living, I believe you can be fined and face serious repercussions, up to and including termination. Or imprisonment, in which case you'd be forced to wear that orange jumpsuit.
How to get your a$$ kicked on every day up to and including St. Patrick's Day
Dear god in heaven, I don't believe that color exists in nature. There is NO excuse for wearing either of these ensembles unless you're working as a body guard for the Lucky Charms leprechaun
And nothing showcases your everlasting love more than the commitment of matching bathing suits. That, and a blonde girl with a look on her face that says "I love the way your junk fights against that fabric."
I could go on, but I'm tired, and my eyes hurt from this trip back in time. I think it's the colors. That said, I will leave you with these tasteful little numbers:
Man, that's sexy.
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"We spend the first half of our lives learning what we love - we should find a way to do those things the second half."Poet and business consultant, David Whyte
Get yourself a creative retirement job - start researching - review your interests -- travel, golf, animals, books whatever - the opportunity is there to do something you love to do - turn your personal passions and experiences into a new source of income - online or offline - start here - (Go to URL)

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November 12, 2007 - Stats Make the World Go Round - Household Tips - Old Age is a Gift

I came across some interesting stats from various sources over the weekend that illustrates that while Canadians and Americans have much in common; there are some major issues we don't agree on - the death penalty is one of them.
Apparently over the summer, the Canadian Conservative party, that currently is working a minority government, conducted a survey to find out how Canadians feel about the death penalty and found only one in five were in favour - supporters ranged from a high of about 30 per cent in Alberta, to a low of 17 per cent in Nova Scotia.
While Canadians remain decisively opposed the idea, it's a full 180 for our neighbours to the south. A Gallup poll last month showed 69 per cent of Americans favour keeping the death penalty as an option for those convicted of murder, a figure that's remained largely the same since 1999.
In another survey, this one conducted in Canada, Australia, Germany, the Netherlands, New Zealand, the United Kingdom, and the United States by the Washington based Commonwealth Fund that supports research on health systems - 80 per cent of Canadian respondents reported they were very or somewhat confident they would get high-quality, safe health care.
The survey found public perceptions in Canada and New Zealand about their health-care systems have grown steadily more positive in the past decade. Their positive views are now comparable to views in Australia and the United Kingdom.
U.S. adults have some of the most negative views about their system of any of the countries surveyed.
Americans also spend double what people in other industrialized countries do on health care, but have more trouble seeing doctors and go without treatment more often, the survey found.
While on the subject of health care - a sidebar:
For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.
The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
CONCLUSION
Eat and drink what you like - speaking English is apparently what kills you.
One more survey - Macleans Magazine sponsored a survey that asked Canadian's their opinions on various topics and came up with the following:
91% of Canadians think people need to change their lifestyle and behaviours to combat climate change.
84% of Canadians who have quit a job say they did so because of their boss.
77% of Canadians say they don't need anything for Christmas.
73% of Canadians believe NAFTA is crucial to North American prosperity.
63% of Canadians say they will register their phone numbers on a pending do-not-call list.
55% of Canadian women consider themselves financially successful.
27% of Canadians believe there are too many immigrants coming to Canada.
23% of Canadians are "clinically sleep deprived"

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A picture of my new computer keyboard.

My thanks to retired buddy Bernice Dini for the following household tips - but first a warning to all retired husbands - print these tips and leave them somewhere were the wife can find them rather than telling her verbally as I did and in doing so, initiated a "why don't you try a few before you post it" order - therefore, of the ones I tried - numbers 2, 4, 8, 9, 13 and 15 worked great - and the windows in this place are so clean the joint could be transported to Holland..
To open a sealed envelope - Put in the freezer for a few hours, then slide a knife under the flap. The envelope can then be resealed. (hmmmmmm...)
Use Empty toilet paper roll to store appliance cords. It keeps them neat and you can write on the roll what appliance it belongs to.
For icy door steps in freezing temperatures: get warm water and put Dawn dish washing liquid in it. Pour it all over the steps. They won't refreeze. (wish I had known this for the last 40 years!)
To remove old wax from a glass candle holder, put it in the freezer for a few hours. Then take the candle holder out and turn it upside down. The wax will fall out.
Permanent marker on appliances/counter tops (like store receipt (BLUE!) rubbing alcohol on paper towel.
Whenever I purchase a box of S.O. S Pads, I immediately take scissors and cut each pad into halves. After years of having to throw away rusted and unused and smelly pads, I finally decided that this would be much more economical. Now a box of S.O.S pads last me indefinitely!
Blood stains on clothes? Not to worry! Just pour a little hydrogen peroxide on a cloth and proceed to wipe off every drop of blood. Works every time! (Now, where to put the body?)
Use vertical strokes when washing windows outside and horizontal for inside windows. This way you can tell which side has the streaks.
Straight vinegar will get outside windows really clean. Don't wash windows on a sunny day. They will dry too quickly and will probably streak.
Spray a bit of perfume on the light bulb in any room to create a lovely light scent in each room when the light is turned on.
Candles will last a lot longer if placed in the freezer for at least 3 hours prior to burning.
To clean artificial flowers, pour some salt into a paper bag and add the flowers. Shake vigorously as the salt will absorb all the dust and dirt and leave your artificial flowers looking like new! Works like a charm!
Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks.
Don't throw out all that leftover wine: Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces ........Left over wine? What's that? :)
Use air-freshener to clean mirrors. It does a good job and better still, leaves a lovely smell to the shine.
When you get a splinter, reach for the scotch tape before resorting to tweezers or a needle. Simply put the scotch tape over the splinter, and then pull it off. Scotch tape removes most splinters painlessly and easily.
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half, and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

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Thanks to retired buddy Bill Ozard for sending in the following.
The other day a young person asked me how I felt about being old.
I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as old. Upon seeing my reaction, she was immediately embarrassed, but I explained that it was an interesting question, and I would ponder it, and let her know.
Old Age, I decided, is a gift.
I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometime despair over my body, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt. Often I am taken aback by that old person that lives in my but I don't agonize over those things for long.
I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.
I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.
Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon ?
I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 40's, 50's, 60&70's, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love .. I will.
I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set.
They, too, will get old.
I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.
Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.
I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.
As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.
So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day. (If I feel like it)
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Remember to research your creative retirement job - ideas start here - (Go to URL)

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November 15, 2007 - Lucky Antonietta and Anthony - Internet Radio memories - MI5 Files - PowerPoint and Videos

Over the years, the Indians have made me realize how Custer felt at Little Big Horn - true, they didn't take my hair but they sure as hell scalped my wallet on many occasions.
I figure I have personally paid for the new paint job in the lobby of their glitzy Las Vegas style casino located near in Orillia Ontario
Like everyone else I have had good days and bad days in this dice-throwing, card shuffling tee-pee, but even the best of my good days were low profit compared to the good day enjoyed recently by Anthony and Antonietta Marrocco.
This charmed couple pocketed 13 thou in the casino and on the way out of the place, Antonietta says to Anthony - "This is sure a lucky day - lets buy a lottery ticket."
Anthony says to Antonietta - "Sure why not - we can afford it."
So they take a couple of bucks out of their 13 thou bankroll and purchase a 2 dollar Lotto 6/49 ticket - jackpot 37 million - and folks around the world - in our country this is tax free money - 37 mill - you get 37 mill - no gimmicks - none of this over twenty years payout after taxes crap.
Yup, they won it - but there's a downside to this story - they had to share the 37 million - they only get 18 million, five hundred thousand tax free dollars.
By the way, the Indians are planning another attack on my snowbird wallet - it was announced yesterday afternoon that Florida will allow Las Vegas type gambling in Seminole's seven reservation casinos one of which is about the same driving distance from this place as it is for the northern Rama trek.
I can hear General Golden Hair shouting the warning from his grave - "Remember Little Big Horn."
But the warning will likely go unheeded - like Custer's 7th Calvary we old retired palefaces will charge forward - or least move as fast as we can - only to be surrounded by card dealing Indians giving the Seminole tomahawk chop salute as they welcome us into their neon encampment - but unlike Custer, we'll get out alive - poorer - but alive.
Going back to the Rama Casino, my favourite crooner Tony Bennett performed there recently. Now, here's a guy who is showing us old geezers the way - he's 81 - still has a great set of pipes - has no intention of retiring - does 150 shows a year.
In a recent interview, the Toronto Star's Greg Quill asked Bennett - "You've virtually exhausted the American songbook ... are you ever afraid you'll run out of material?
Answer:
"There was such an explosion of brilliant songwriting in the 1920s through the 1940s; I think the Depression and World War II had a lot to do with that. I compare it to the Renaissance in France. It was very economical to put on shows, and there were hundreds of them, thousands. Even shows that didn't do well had one or two great songs. They were the art form of the time, and composers jammed with each other, showing off their songs and getting new ideas along the way. Fifty years from now I think that will be looked on as America's classical period. I don't think I'll ever run out.... I have all of Sinatra, my master, Nat King Cole's records, Ella (Fitzgerald) ... they're never going to sound worse."
Amen to that - but the trouble for top-age-level seniors like me who grew up with this music, it's difficult to find it anywhere on the radio - we're a minority.
I was OK when I had satellite radio in the car - but that was stolen - my home-made CD's keep me sane and in control while driving the car and now, thanks to the web, I can tune into my favourite back-home radio station with the all time favourite format - 50's and 60's with a dash of big band 40's.
I can even Email requests as I did the other day, to ask for Bennett's "Because of You" that I used to play back in the early 50's for the CIC before we were married and I was the early morning DJ, Sports Director, play by play hockey announcer and standby janitor for Barrie's 250 watt radio station
As I write this, they're playing the 40's classic - I love Coffee, I love Tea" by the Mills Brothers - Give it a try - great music bringing back memories of great times - just click on the box in the top left corner to go live even if your living in Samoa - ain't the internet a wondrous thing?.
One more note - 7PM to midnight Tuesday nights, DJ .Bob Sprott features Big Band material as does, an old friend from my Barrie summer fill-in newscaster Radio days of a few years ago - George Jonescu who, on Sunday nights, 7PM to midnight hosts 'Big Band Sunday Night'.
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I have never met Dave Boufford and I have no affiliation with this website, but I like his message in this slide show video - there's a popup at the end asking you to sign up for his newsletter - that's up to you - The Seven Wonders of the World
Retired Florida buddy Bernice Dini sent me this and I may never forgive her - the damn thing drove me crazy -this simple reaction test took me down big time - the best I could do 23 seconds and that was after twenty five minutes of trying and after the CIC told me to quiet down - "the neighbours would not appreciate that type of gutter talk" - Try the Red Square Test and good luck.
Bernie also sent in this video which will be particular interest to our American friends - the guy has talent.
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Forget John le Carre, Ian Fleming, James Grady and all the other great Spy novelists - this is the real thing and it makes for fascinating reading.
MI5, the Brits Security Service, are highlighting some of the files that have been released over the past ten years.
These new web pages illustrate three of the Security Service's most notable espionage cases and feature copies of original MI5 documents, many of which have never been published before. They include formerly top secret surveillance reports, memos, hand-written accounts and photographs of MI5 operations.
Get yourself a coffee or whatever and plan to spend some time here -
Carl Hans Lody, a German spy in the First World War who became the first person to be executed in the Tower of London for over a hundred years - Hans Lody
Eddie Chapman, alias ZIGZAG, a British double agent in the Second World War who was awarded the Iron Cross by Hitler - Eddie Chapman
Klaus Fuchs, a German-born nuclear physicist who gave the Soviets the secrets of the atomic bomb. Klaus Fuchs

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Have a couple of PowerPoint slide shows to pass on - thanks to nearly retired buddies Tim and Toni Grace for this one - spectacular pictures taken with an old brownie camera by a sailor during the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbour
The second is from retired buddies Craig and Cathy Olson an educational piece for women produced by a guy.
If your computer doesn't have a PowerPoint viewer download your FREE viewer here.
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And finally:
An old man left the retirement home to go to a movie with his pet chicken on his shoulder.
He asks for 2 tickets. The cashier asks who the other ticket is for and the tells her, "It's for my pet chicken."
She tells him, "You can't take a chicken in there!" So the man leaves, goes around the corner, and stuffs the chicken into his pants.
He goes back, buys one ticket, and goes into the theater. The chicken is getting hot, so the man unzips his pants so the chicken can stick his head out and watch the movie.
Next to him sit two old ladies. Agnes leans over and whispers to Mildred, "Mildred, this man has his PANTS unzipped!"
Mildred tells her, "Don't worry about it....you've seen one, you've seen them all!"
Agnes says, "Oh I know! But THIS one is eating my popcorn!!"
Have a great weekend and don't forget to start planning your creative retirement job - start here - (Go to URL)

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November 19, 2007 - The Lost Platoon - Japanese TV - Optimism Good or Bad - Billy Joel

A warning to all husbands living or visiting this week in the United States - book back to back golf games or work on you car's engine - cover yourself with crease so you can't go out in public - whatever it takes - otherwise you will join the "lost platoon" just like I did yesterday.
For me it started just after I had completed the heavy lifting of the Sunday morning newspaper - settled in my Easy Boy and without thinking - passed the New York City telephone book thick pile of advertising flyers, pamphlets and coupons to the CIC.
Before I had time to check on Sydney Crosby's climb up the NHL's scoring ladder, I was informed with great urgency - " Can you believe this - 40% to 70% off plus another 20% off when you check out - it's their Thanksgiving Special Preview - from 4PM to 10PM - lets eat out tonight before we go."
The headlines say retailers are predicting a slow shopping season but you could fool me - last night, while the Patriots were running roughshod over the Bills, this Florida retailer's store was jammed with literally hundreds of women pushing shopping carts loaded with everything from Bras to Capri's and God help the person who gets in their way - no quarter given or asked.
And I swear - at the time of our visit - I was the only male customer in the place - talk about wimp-warp - so I begged off and retreated to the front entrance and there I joined the Lost Platoon - a group of unsmiling, dejected males sitting on white plastic patio chairs - all wondering how the hell they allowed this to happen - and guess what - all of us were retirees - you would think we would know better after all these years.
No doubt this will be repeated thousands of times during this great American shopping week that peaks during what they call - "Black Friday" - hundreds camp out 24 hours ahead to be able to bust through store doors at 5AM in the morning.
Later the CIC told me an older woman had accidentally bumped into her and apologized saying - "I'm sorry dear - I'm getting a little tired - I've been here for three hours and haven't found a thing but I'm not leaving until I do." - it has to be in the female DNA.
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I confess to being a television traditionalist - dramas, situation comedies, documentaries - stuff like that - for me, reality shows were deranged people chow down on beetle brains and lie in coffins filled with creepy crawlies is not worth a network nod - however - if they came up with something like this Japanese show - I would be a regular.
In my warped way I find humour in the mishaps of others when it's staged - the old comedy shtick of falling down or a poke in the eye as perfected by the likes of Buster Keaton, The Three Stooges and Red Skelton.
Anyway, my son Gord sent me this and it's a riot
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My weekend web wanderings uncovered interesting new research from Duke University's Fuqua School of Business - There are optimists and there are extreme optimists and the difference between the two groups is quite remarkable.
Manju Puri and David Robinson, professors of finance at Duke, compared the statistical and self-reported life expectancies and categorized anyone who expected to live longer than the data predicted as an optimist.
"Most of the information we needed was already there, but we had to create a new way of combining it with other existing data in order to extract meaning about optimism," Puri said.
The researchers labeled as "extreme optimists" the top 5 percent of optimists, those who think they will live an average of 20 years longer than is statistically likely.
The research found that optimists - work longer hours; - invest in individual stocks - save more money - are more likely to pay their credit card balances on time - believe their income will grow over the next five years - plan to retire later (or not at all) - are more likely to remarry (if divorced).
In comparison, extreme optimists - work significantly fewer hours - hold a higher proportion of individual stocks in their portfolios - are more likely to be day traders - save less money - are less likely to pay off their credit card balances on a regular basis - are more likely to smoke.
Robinson notes - "Doctors tell us that one or two glasses of red wine a day can be really healthy - but no one tells you to drink the whole bottle.
It's the same with optimism. A little bit is really beneficial, but too much can lead to some really bad economic choices."
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This is great - sent in by retired buddy Bill Ozard who lives in oil rich Albtera - who writes;
Whether you are a Billy Joel fan or not, you probably remember his great song "We Didn't Start the Fire."
Here it is, set to pictures---very very cool!
Had to share this one. It's a cooool flashback through the past half century.
Turn up volume, sit back and enjoy a review of 50 years of history in less than three minutes!
Thanks to Billy Joel and some guy from the University of Chicago with too much time to Google! - everybody sing-along
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My thanks to retired buddy Jim Hill for today's kicker :
The retired couple were preparing for breakfast - she was in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast.
The old guy, who retired some six years earlier walks in and she turns and says: - You've got to make love to me this very moment.'
He couldn't believe what he was hearing - his eyes light up while noting - "This is my lucky day."
Not wanting to lose the moment, he embraced his wife and gave his best, right there on the kitchen table.
Afterwards she said, "Thanks" and returned to the stove.
More than a little puzzled, he asked, "What was that all about?"
"The egg timer's broken."
Have a great week - now it's time to start working on your creative retirement job - start here - (Go to URL)

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November 22, 2007 - A Great Deal to be Thankful For

As a Snowbird with a Family that consists, at the moment, of grandchildren who have grown past the Santa phase, it was decided a couple of years ago, that our annual thanksgiving/Christmas family feast and gift gathering assembly would be held on the second Monday of October - the Canadian thanksgiving day - a wonderful event that always starts with the toast - "here's to family."
But being a Snowbird also means that thanks to the generosity and hospitality of American Neighbours, we get to publicly declare our thanks a second time, which for me includes love of wife, family and friends - 79 birthdays and reasonably good health.
But this year I have added another blessing - that of the young men and women of various free nations who are protesting us from those who would harm us while at the same time helping the oppressed put together a society built on freedoms we take for granted.
My admiration of these military volunteers is based on many assignments during my work years, that reported on the Canadian military as peacekeepers and warriors.
However, between my two thanksgiving meals, two more Canadian soldiers have traveled the "Highway of Heroes"
This stretch of the 401 highway in southern Ontario stretches from Canadian Forces Base Trenton to Toronto, and again, this week, area residents gathered on overpasses to pay tribute to
Corp. Nicolas Raymond Beauchamp of the 5th Field Ambulance and Pte. Michel Levesque of the Royal 22nd Regiment - The Van Doos - who, along with their Afghan interpreter, were killed last Saturday while traveling in a Light Armoured Vehicle (LAV) when it struck a landmine on a road near Bazar-e Panjwaii, west of Kandahar City.
The soldiers were conducting a "targeted security operation" in support of Afghan National Army at the time of the attack.
So, on this second thanksgiving day, I've had to change the "war on terror" honour roll numbers on the Connect2Canada page of the home website.
The deaths of Corp. Beauchamp and Pte. Levesque brings to 73 the number of Canadian troops killed at the hands of the enemy or in accidents in Afghanistan since 2002.
With these latest casualties, 174 international troops have been killed in Afghanistan this year - most in combat operations against militants.

They are dead; but they live in each Patriot's breast,
And their names are engraven on honor's bright crest.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
More than 18,500 troops make up ISAF, with contributions from 36 nations.
To learn more about the NATO force and mission - click here for their official web site.
Honor to the soldier, and Sailor everywhere , who bravely bears his country's cause,
Honor also to the citizen who cares for his brother in the field, and serves, as he best can, the same cause.
(Abraham Lincoln)
To learn more about this attack plus additional special reports, visit my old network - CTV News - Assignment Afghanistan.
If you are with family for thanksgiving dinner or, in other parts of the world - just dinner - offer a toast to the Military volunteers in far away places who are protecting us while helping others to live free. (Go to URL)

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November 26, 2007 - Good News Stories - Shopping Day for Guys - A Retirees Alphabet

I've commented on this before - cable and network newscasts and newspaper headlines bombard us with blood and guts, violence, death and destruction stories to the point of generating negative thinking.
What a relief yesterday morning when one of my favourite television news magazine programs - CBS Sunday Morning - featured a series of "Good News" stories - so I thought that today's entry could do the same.
First, from CBS Sunday Morning - a wonderful human interest story -
"The paints all worn out, the cotton is coming out of the seats, there's a hole in the running board, it's the worst looking car at every antique car show." - so says 85 year old Cleve Curtis about his old Ford Model A that has won 15 trophies.
It's not just the car that won top prize - it's the story that goes with it - he bought it in 1937, used, for ten bucks and to gas it up he stole his dad's moonshine - "I put that booze in the gas tank and son of a gun it run good!"
Take two and minutes to view this report - Cleve and his Angel and their model A - you have to sit through a short commercial first but what the hey.
Next this was forwarded by retired buddy Bill Ozard- who writes - It's a tough, but heartwarming story...with a picture of John Gebhardt in Iraq -
According to John Gebhardt's wife, Mindy, this little girl's entire family was executed. The insurgents intended to execute the little girl also, and shot her in the head...but they failed to kill her.
She was cared for in John's hospital and is healing up, but continues to cry and moan.
The nurses said John is the only one who seems to calm her down, so John has spent the last four nights holding her while they both slept in that chair. The girl is coming along with her healing.
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Just so you know - click here for your Christmas countdown
As someone once said - men buy - women shop and if that be true - and I'm sure it is - in the good old U.S of A, today is the male version of Black Friday - the female-in-the-mall-after-thanksgiving-shopping-day.
This is Cyber Monday - retailers are offering huge discount prices for on-line shoppers and they are expecting sales to be more than 700 million, a new record
Also, according to stats, the majority of on-line shoppers on this Cyber Monday will be guys and if you look at the projections you can see why - the hottest category continues to be video games, consoles and accessories, which is up 134 percent versus the corresponding days last year - electronics sales are also up 21 percent, just behind furniture, appliances, and equipment, whose sales have grown 36 percent compared to last year.
And yes - I'll be right there with them - as soon as I finish this assignment, I will be booting up with my list in front of me - a tall thermos filled with sugar spiked coffee on standby - don't have to dress up - no traffic or parking hassles and no waiting around for others to make up their minds - ain't the web a thing of beauty and to think back in the late 80's I was dragged kicking and screaming into the computer age.
I was nearing old age pension age when the newsroom was computerized - they forced me to give up my old electric typewriter that I pounded with two finger proficiency for many years - it was like losing an old friend.
As noted in my journal it wasn't until I was well past old age pension age that I wholeheartedly embraced the on-line world.
The realization of the possibilities of the internet and it's mental exercising benefits came when I discovered Site Build It
Like other seniors I had to combat the - "I'm too old" - "I can't do it" - barriers, and overcoming such pessimism is a biggie, especially when your living the final quarter.
But the fact is without Site Build It I would have likely given up and quit early in frustration - but this outfit took me by the hand and showed me the way - they took care of all the techie stuff - and using their building block approach -I was able to build my first website - it was easier than I imagined.
If you want to be creatively active, you should give it a shot and down the line - the extra income ain't too shabby.
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Thanks to retired Buddy Jim Hill for today's kicker - The New Alphabet
Ais for apple, and B is for boat,
That used to be right, but now it won't float!
Age before beauty is what we once said,
But let's be a bit more realistic instead.
A's for arthritis;
B's the bad back,
C's the chest pains, perhaps car-d-iac?
D is for dental decay and decline,
E is for eyesight, can't read that top line!
F is for fissures and fluid retention,
G is for gas which I'd rather not mention.
H is high blood pressure-I'd rather it low;
I is for incisions with scars you can show.
J is for joints, out of socket, won't mend,
k is for knees that crack when they bend.
L is for libido, what happened to sex?
M is for memory, I forget what comes next.
N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low;
o is for osteo, the bones that don't grow!
P is for prescriptions, I have quite a few, Just give me a pill and I'll be good as new!
Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu?
R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.
S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears,
T is for Tinnitus; there's bells in my ears!
U is for urinary; big troubles with flow;
V is for vertigo, that's "dizzy," you know.
W is for worry, NOW what's going 'round?
X is for X ray, and what might be found.
Y is another year I'm left here behind,
Z is for zest that I still have-- in my mind.
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Now let's start working on your creative retirement job - build yourself a website - yes, you can do it - start here - (Go to URL)

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November 29, 2007 - Old Love - The last Lecture - Keep a worry Log - Modern Noah's Ark

Yesterday, a group of us attended a Christmas production - a matinee - so naturally the theater was filled with retirees and during the intermission, the MC offered a prize to the couple who had been married the longest.
He started by asking couples who had been married more than 50 years to please stand up - so the CIC and I stood up along with half of the audience.
He then started adding a year at a time and when he reach 55 we sat down, but the majority were still standing.
The prize winning couple had been hitched 63 years.
Researchers refer to it as "Old Love" the other end of the age scale being "Young Love" - and their research shows that relationships develop over time and enhanced by memories - both good and bad - plus the brain, as it grows older, becomes more programmed to be happy in relationships.
Psychologist Mary Pipher, who has studied at the emotional life of the elderly notes, "The really interesting script isn't that people like to have sex. The really interesting script is what people are willing to put up with.
Young love is about wanting to be happy. Old love is about wanting someone else to be happy."
Here's another interesting quote - Laura L. Carstensen, director of the Stanford Center on Longevity says: "As you get older you begin to recognize that this isn't going to last forever, for better or for worse, You understand that the bad times pass, and you understand that the good times pass - as you experience them, they're more precious, they're richer."
Carstensen also notes - "A broken heart looks different in somebody old. You don't yell and scream and cry all day long like you might if you were 20."
And for the young, Mary Pipher has this advise - ""If you stay married there's riches in store that nobody 25 years old can imagine."
Editor's note: none of the researchers mentioned the fact that you have to work at it.
Anyway, after observing yesterday's senior marriage count, it reminded me of a wonderful story told by the great American story teller Studs Terkel -
There was an elderly man who took up with a much younger woman, and they were happy for some time.
Then one day he meets one of his old buddies on the street, without the lady.
"What happened?" the friend asks.
"She didn't know the songs," the elderly man replies."
And while on the subject of old love - retired buddy Tom Adams sent in the following:
An elderly couple was having dinner one evening when the husband reached across the table, took his wife's hand in his and said, "Martha, soon we will be married 50 years, and there's something I have to know. In all of these 50 years have you ever been unfaithful to me?"<
Martha replied,
"Well Henry, I have to be honest with you. Yes, I've been unfaithful to you three times during these 50 years, but always for a good reason."
Henry was obviously hurt by his wife's confession, but said,
"I never suspected. Can you tell me what you mean by 'good reasons?'"
Martha said,
"The first time was shortly after we were married, and we were about to lose our little house because we couldn't pay the mortgage. Do you remember that one evening I went to see the banker and the next day he notified you that the loan would be extended?"
Henry recalled the visit to the banker and said,
"I can forgive you for that. You saved our home, but what about the second time?"
Martha asked, "And do you remember when you were so sick, but we didn't have the money to pay for the heart surgery you needed? Well I went to see your doctor one night and, if you recall, he did the surgery at no charge."
"I recall that, and you did it to save my life, so of course I can forgive you for that. Now tell me about the third time."
"All right -do you remember when you ran for president of your golf club, and you needed 73 more votes?"
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I realize that I'm extremely late on this one - millions of folks have already benefited from this video - but if you haven't seen Professor Randy Pausch's last lecture allow me to urge you to do so - but only when you have the time to view it when you know you won't be interrupted - this man is inspiring - a 46-year-old computer science professor and father of three preschoolers who has incurable pancreatic cancer - he's been given only a few months to live - his "live to the last" attitude reminds me of my daughter Cynthia Anne Marie who we lost to cancer several years go.
Have the family gather around the computer - The lecture was taped so his children, ages 5, 2 and 1, can watch it when they're older - note his last words - "this is for my kids" - Professor Pausch's last lecture
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Some great pics - retired buddy Bernice Dini sent this link - Space Station shots from NASA
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Here's an interesting concept - schedule time to worry.
In their new book - The Insomnia Answer - Paul Glovinsky, PhD, and Arthur Spielman, PhD, suggest that before you hit the sheets at night, take ten or fifteen minutes, grab some paper and a pen and jot down the problems and worry's that are bugging you at the moment.
They suggest listing your concerns on the left page of a notebook and then brainstorming some solutions on the right side and these don't have to be perfect problem-solvers. Even temporary solutions should help you sleep.
And on the other side of the scale, keeping a journal and listing things your grateful for in your life could have emotional rewards.
New research reveals that people who record in a weekly or daily journal, the things in their lives for which they were grateful experienced heightened feelings of well-being. The people who recorded hassles or neutral life events in their journals did not.
Maintaining a daily journal can also help your memory.
According to the real age website - a study revealed that people who jotted down their concerns experienced improvement in their memories. Researchers speculate that jotting down worries may be a cathartic act. It gives people a designated place to deal with their concerns so that they can worry less at other times, thus freeing up cognitive resources for other things, such as remembering lists.
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And my thanks to retired Email buddy Paul Wedge for today's kicker:
The year 2007, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in the United States , and said, "Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good humans."
He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, "You have 6 months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights"
Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard - but no Ark.
"Noah! I'm about to start the rain! where is the Ark ?"
"Forgive me, Lord, but things have changed. I needed a building permit. I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler system.
My neighbors claim that I've violated the neighborhood zoning laws by building the Ark in my yard and exceeding the height limitations.
We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for a decision.
Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark 's move to the sea.
I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it.
Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the spotted owl.
I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go!
When I started gathering the animals, an animal rights group sued me.
They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodation was too restrictive, and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.
Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.
I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew.
Immigration and Naturalization are checking the green-card status of most of the people who want to work.
The trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with Ark-building experience.
To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species.
So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to finish this Ark."
Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky. Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean you're not going to destroy the world?"
"No," said the Lord. "The government beat me to it!"

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