Positive, Productive, Profitable Retirement News

Today's retirement news entry will be brief - I'm working with new software in order to secure additional research for the host site - and if you're a regular reader of this journal, you know, for me, that means a fairly large learning curve.

So, I will let others cover for me today.

The fact is, for retirees or working stiffs, it takes a tremendous amount of energy to achieve a high level of happiness and contentment - positive visualization can be a great motivator IF you concentrate and allow the images and the words, to sink in - absorb the beauty - engrave the words deep in your mind.

I don't know who produced the following - so I can't list the credits - but it's an interesting item to have on your computer when you're experiencing the blahs.

These are PowerPoint presentations so you'll need a PP viewer - no problem - you can download your free viewer here.

This first offering is Happiness is a Voyage

The second presentation is a short presentation to make you smile - Our pets are really people in disguise.

Just one other note - this was in the morning Email - from retired friend Denise Dini - it goes along with the above.
Those of us in our retirement years do, on occasion, bitch about our lot in life.
Here's a few thoughts we should consider when we allow ourselves to sink in the swamp of self pity -

I AM THANKFUL:

• For the wife who says its hot dogs tonight, because she is home with me, and not out with someone else.
• For the husband who is on the sofa being a couch potato because he is home with me and not out with the boys.
• For the teenage granddaughter who is complaining about doing the dishes because it means she is home with us - not roaming the streets.
• For the taxes I pay, because it means I have retirement income.
• For the mess to clean up after a party because it means I have been surrounded by friends.
• For the clothes that fit a little too snug because it means I have enough to eat - even if it's the wrong kind of food sometimes.
• For the shadow that watches me work, because it means I'm out in the sunshine.
• For the lawn that needs mowing, windows that need cleaning and gutters that need fixing, because it means I have a home.
• For all the complaining I hear about the government because it means we have freedom of speech.
• For the parking spot I find at the far end of the parking lot because it means I'm capable of walking and I have been bless with transportation.
• For my huge heating bill in the winter and the huge electric bill in the summer because it means I'm warm in the winter and cool in the summer.
• For the lady behind me in church who sings off key because it means I can hear.
• For the pile of laundry and ironing because it means I have clothes to wear.
• For the alarm that goes off in the early morning hours because it means - I am alive.
• And finally, too much Email because it means I have friends who are thinking of me.

Have a great day - lets get to work on our creative retirement job - (Go to URL)

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August 4, 2006 - Lest we forget

No retirement news today - unfortunately, we end the week on a sad note - once again, I had to change the "war on terror" honour roll numbers on the Connect2Canada page of the home website.

Four Canadian soldiers were killed and 10 injured yesterday in three separate Taliban attacks in Southern Afghanistan -

• Cpl. Christopher Jonathan Reid
• Cpl. Bryce Jeffrey Keller
• Sgt. Vaughn Ingram
• Pte. Kevin Dallaire.

All four soldiers were from the Edmonton-based Princess Patricia's Canadian Light Infantry.

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They are dead; but they live in each Patriot's breast,
And their names are engraven on honor's bright crest.

~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

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It must be remembered, that we are not alone in this war on terror.

This NATO-led force, operating under a United Nations mandate, is made up of mostly of British, Canadian and Dutch troops.

The mission is considered the most dangerous and challenging in the Western alliance's 57-year history.

"In one sense it is historical," said British Lt. Gen. David Richards, the commander of the NATO-led International Security Assistance Force. "But also it is important for the safety of the free world that Afghanistan is not allowed to be tipped back to its pre-9/11 state and allow a Taliban look-alike government with its sympathies to come back into power."

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As a follow-up - my daughter-in-law Julie Emailed me the following this morning - From the daughter of a Soldier.........

"Last week I was in Trenton, Ontario. attending a conference. While I was in the airport, returning home, I heard several people behind me beginning to clap and cheer. I immediately turned round and witnessed one of the greatest act's of patriotism I have ever seen.

Moving through the terminal was a group of soldiers in their camo's, as they began heading to their gate everyone (well almost everyone) was abruptly to their feet with their hands waving and cheering.

When I saw the soldiers, probably 30-40 of them, being applauded and cheered for it hit me. I'm not alone. I'm not the only Canadian who still loves this country and supports our troops and their families.

Of course I immediately stopped and began clapping for these young unsung heroes who are putting their lives on the line everyday,

Just when I thought I could not be more proud of my country or of our service men and women a young girl, not more than 6 or 7 years old, ran up to one of the male soldiers. He kneeled down and said "hi," the little girl then she asked him if he would give something to her daddy for her.
The young soldier, he didn't look any older than maybe 22 himself, said he would try and what did she want to give to her daddy.
Then suddenly the little girl grabbed the neck of this soldier, gave him the biggest hug she could muster and then kissed him on the cheek.

The mother of the little girl, who said her daughters name was Courtney, told the young soldier that her husband was a Corporal and had been in Afghanistan for 11 months now.
As the mom was explaining how much her daughter, Courtney, missed her father, the young soldier began to tear up.
When this temporarily single mom was done explaining her situation, all of the soldiers huddled together for a brief second. Then one of the other servicemen pulled out a military looking walkie-talkie. They started playing with the device and talking back and forth on it.

After about 10-15 seconds of this, the young soldier walked back over to Courtney, bent down and said this to her, "I spoke to your daddy and he told me to give this to you."
He then hugged this little girl that he had just met and gave her a kiss on the cheek.
He finished by saying "your daddy told me to tell you that he loves you more than anything and he is coming home very soon."

The mom at this point was crying almost uncontrollably and as the young soldier stood to his feet he saluted Courtney and her mom.

I was standing no more than 6 feet away from this entire event unfolded. As the soldiers began to leave, heading towards their gate, people resumed their applause.
As I stood there applauding and looked around, there were few dry eyes, including my own.
That young soldier in one last act of selflessness, turned around and blew a kiss to Courtney with a tear rolling down his cheek.

We need to remember everyday all of our soldiers and their families and thank God for them and their sacrifices.

At the end of the day, it's good to be a Canadian.

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August 7, 2006 - Retirement survey - testing our resolve and happy birthday to the web

It would be very much appreciated if you would take less than a minute to complete my PPP retirement Job survey - thank you.

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Retirement News entries coming up, but first please bear with me for this follow-up to the last entry concerning the "war on terror" causalities.>

Many Canadians are questioning our mission in Afghanistan - after all our global military involvement since the Korean war, has been based on peacekeeping not warfare - but the war on terror is a global threat.

Even the liberal leaning Toronto Star, Canada's largest newspaper, in a recent editorial urging Prime Minister Stephen Harper to outline his views on how this mission is evolving, offered this view -

"In the meantime, Canadians should bear in mind that this battle is not ours alone.

There are 40,000 American and NATO troops from three dozen nations in Afghanistan, under a United Nations mandate.

More than 400 have died since 2001, including 323 Americans and now 23 Canadians, (Editor's note- now 24) as well as one of our diplomats.

Those troops are fighting to prevent a return of Taliban leader Mullah Mohammad Omar and his ilk, who befriended Osama bin Laden before 9/ 11 and who have turned their fury on 100 schools in recent months, killing children.
They blew shoppers to pieces at a bazaar this week, in a scene of indescribable carnage.
They bombed mourners as they emerged from a funeral service at a mosque.
They murder teachers and aid workers.

Canada promised when it agreed to join the Afghan mission that we would help the people of that war-ravaged country fight the Taliban.
We also promised that we would help them reconstruct their shattered nation.
Harper needs to tell both Canadians and the Afghan people that this country will keep both of those promises."

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This is interesting - check out the four candles - Wait for the first 3 candles to go out then watch the 4th candle

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Happy birthday to the web - fifteen years old as of yesterday - to be honest I thought it was older than that but we of retirement age have been slow in catching on to the possibilities.

However, it was fifteen years ago yesterday Tim Berners-Lee posted the first web page on the internet introducing "a force for individual, regional and global understanding."

Today, 1.1 billion people tour the web for everything from porn to products - games to gambling - news to nonsense but mostly for information - information you may have - information the searcher is willing to pay for - an online retirement job opportunity for you.

And on this birthday - some stats for your retirement job consideration -

• Number of web searches per month - 5.7 billion.
• Number of web pages viewed per household per month (excluding work place viewing) - 1,373
• Number of hours per month of web viewing by home PC users - 28.
• Time spent in each web surfing session - 51 minutes.
• Estimated number of blogs in spring of 2006 - 50 million plus.
• Estimated number of new blogs created each day - 75,000.

SPINNING THE WEB

Growth in total number of websites -

• 1992:50
• 1993:150
• 1994:3,000
• 1995:25,000
• 1996:250,000
• 1997:1.2 million
• 2001. 30 million
• 2002:37 million
• 2003:47 million
• 2004:54 million
• 2005:73 million
• 2006:93 million

Value of Online Sales

• 2001: $6.5 billion
• 2002: $11.1 billion
• 2003: $18.9 billion
• 2004: $28.3 billion
• 2005: $39.2 billion

Why aren't you getting a piece of pie?

Let's research some retirement job ideas - (Go to URL)

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August 8, 2006 - Retirees - never too old

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Retirees - never too old to catch a killer.

There's a Brit TV series - "New tricks" - about a cop squad made up of retired detectives who solve cold cases - great series, but as usual with Brit productions, too short - they only do 6 or 8 episodes then call it quits no matter how popular the series.

Anyway, this morning the Associated Press had a story on a real life "New Tricks" squad of retired cops who coaxed a confession out of a Colorado convict that solved a series of murders.

Charlie Hess, 79 year old retired FBI and CIA agent, Lou Smit, 71, a retired cop and Scott Fischer, 60 year old retired newspaper publisher, dubbed "the Apple Dumpling Gang" by admiring members of the El Paso County Sheriff's department, worked the case for nearly three years to get Robert Charles Browne to confess to as many as 49 murders committed between 1970 and 1995 - so far police have been able to confirm Browne's claim to six of the cases.

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Retirees - never too old to learn what it's all about -

• Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.
• Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
• Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
• Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.
• If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
• Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
• Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
• The second mouse gets the cheese.
• Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
• You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
• Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
• We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names, and all are different colors, But they all have to live in the same box.
• A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

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Retirees - never too old - period

In today's morning newspaper I truly enjoyed and appreciated a column by Evelyn Hannon who was commenting on getting older in a world that promotes "ways to look younger" - "Aging, instead of a badge of honour, has become a shameful thing that we're taught to hide."

Mz. Hannon truly loved and admired her mother who passed away at the age of 94 - "Having helped our family's matriarch negotiate her way through the death process, I understand completely that getting old is not for sissies."

Mz. Hannon's closing paragraphs should on passed on to all retirees and those approaching their retirement years -

"And my wrinkles? Believe me, I'm no martyr. These physical changes aren't easy to love. Ads scream out at me from bus shelters, magazines and newspapers. Botox this; lift that. Be mistaken for your daughter.

In truth, I have no desire to be like my daughters. I'm their mother and I enjoy my role tremendously. I care far less about bee-stung lips and much more about working to be an active, informed participant in the circle of life.

I know my grandchildren are looking to me and absorbing what they will need to live their own full lives. This provides my impetus to move forward and enjoy the future in the most natural way possible.

Telling a bedtime story to a wide-eyed grandchild is definitely one of life's best gifts.
Opportunities to learn are endless.
There's a great big world for me to explore and I now have the time to do it.
Who cares about the wrinkles? In my heart I'm still just a girl blessed with a grandmother's face."

You go girl - Now lets explore that great big world for a creative challenge - (Go to URL)

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August 9, 2006 - Retirees, too old to compute? - the animal quiz

The newspaper headline reads - "Boomers lead drive for Retirement Jobs" - that's true but many people think it's working moms who are leading that parade.

My sister-law's daughter just negotiated a new work arrangement with her employer - one of the countries largest banks - she now works at home, on her own schedule via her computer and the internet - she visits the office once a week for a staff meeting.

But she is not in the forefront of the fight to make employers more flexible - studies show it's older workers - baby boomers who want a different workplace arrangement.

But as reported in an earlier retirement news entry, a recent survey by the international bank HSBC shows only 30 percent of employers offer older workers opportunities to work fewer hours on a more flexible schedule. Many companies are still pushing older workers out the door, saying they cost more than younger workers.

However, boomers are realizing there's another option - a better option -for those who want to work because they need or want to earn money - self-employment.

For the past 10 years, adults ages 55 to 64 have been the group most likely to start a new business, according to a study released in May by the Ewing Marion Kauffman Foundation, which promotes entrepreneurship.

As one nearing-retirement-age respondent noted - "We want to slow down, but we don't want to twiddle our thumbs."
Many in this group have turned to Ecommerce.

I haven't uncovered any official statistics on this but I would suggest that those already in their retirement years feel the same way. However, because many in this already- in-retirement group started late in learning computer and internet basics, they're reluctant to venture into something that seems, on the surface, as too complicated and difficult.

Knowing from personal experience this is not the case - at least when you have someone show you the way step-by-step as well as taking care of all the techie stuff (that was the most important benefit for me) - I am working on a new chapter for the host website.

To help me research for this new chapter - Please take less than a minute to complete the PPP retirement Job survey - and thank you.

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My thanks to retired buddy Bill Ozard who resides in the oil rich province of Alberta (Ontario jealousy) - for Emailing me the following -

Working stiff or retiree you'll enjoy this...The test was actually done by Anderson Consulting Worldwide.

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator?
Wrong Answer.
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend... except one. Which animal does not attend?
Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory.

4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?
Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.

According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong, but many preschoolers got several correct answers.
Anderson Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a four-year-old.

I bet the majority of retirees aced that one - now lets get working on our creative retirement job - (Go to URL)

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August 10, 2006 - The red planet and retirement wisdom

I wonder what our world will be like in 2287 - obviously no one reading this will be around to find out and that's why the following video sent to me by daughter-in-law Julie is interesting stuff - It's a PowerPoint presentation - click here to download

In case you don't have one installed on your computer - click here to download your free PP viewer from Microsoft.

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We all know that some retired folks can be cranky, opinionated and downright cheerless at times, but I would like to pass on a couple of "feel good" stories about retirement types who, with simple words, made a difference in a young person's life.
The first I witnessed personally yesterday on the golf course -

There was a hold-up on the fourth tee - a girl, barely in her teens, was being taught the game of golf by her mother.
The youngster whiffed three times in a row and, near tears, looked back at those of us waiting and said to her mother - "this is embarrassing let's pick up and quit."

Before her mother has a chance to answer, an older man in the group ahead of us, shouted out - "no don't quit." He then walked up the teenager and said - "Young lady, there no such thing as being embarrassed when it comes to the game of golf - even Tiger Woods makes a bad shot. Besides you should be happy to be here with your mother on this beautiful day - it doesn't get any better than this. And don't ever quit any challenge you undertake."

Then with a huge smile and an exaggerated swing of his arm he added - "take a look at this group - we're all too old to be rushing to play through - in fact you're doing us a favor by allowing us to rest."

Everyone laughed and on her next try, the youngster skipped the ball about 50 yards down the fairway and we all applauded and she marched down the fiarway with a smile on her face - her mother mouthed a "thank you."

I told him - his name was Eric - that was a great thing he did - he fluffed it off saying - "Oh! to be that young again."

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This was Emailed by retired buddy Denise Dini -

"A grandmother took her grandchildren to a restaurant.
The six-year-old grandson asked if he could say grace.
As they bowed their heads he said, "God is good, God is great. Thank you for the food, and I would even thank you more if Gran gets us ice cream for dessert. And Liberty and justice for all! - Amen!"

Along with the laughter from the other customers nearby, an elderly lady loudly remarked, "That's what's wrong with this country. Kids today don't even know how to pray.
Asking God for ice cream! Why, I never!"

Hearing this, the little boy burst into tears and asked his grandmother, "Did I do it wrong? Is God mad at me?"

As she held him and assured him that he had done a terrific job and God was certainly not mad at him, an elderly gentleman approached the table.
He winked at the young lad and said, "I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer.
"Really?"
"Cross my heart," the man replied.
Then in a theatrical whisper he added (indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing), "Too bad she never asks God for ice cream. A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes."

Naturally, the grandmother bought the kids ice cream at the end of the meal.
The young boy stared at his for a moment. After a short pause, he picked up his sundae and without a word, walked over and placed it in front of the elderly woman.

With a big smile he told her, "Here, this is for you. Ice cream is good for the soul sometimes; and my soul is good already."

The End.

Now let's take all that experience and wisdom we retirees have and work on our creative retirement job - (Go to URL)

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August 11, 2006 - Outdoor movies come out of retirement - interesting stats and never forget

Please take less than a minute to complete the PPP retirement Job survey - Thank you.

I'm an admitted movie addict - a retired flick freak who, during the summer months, enjoys getting his flick fix at the local drive-in theatre - yup we have one - a three-screener just north of the city.
Audrey and I took our granddaughter to the drive-in the other night to see a double bill - Ant Bully and Pirates of the Caribbean.

As many of you in the retirement community remember, drive-in theatres were invented in the 1940s - mushroomed in the '50s and hit their stride in the '60s when baby boomers started driving and going on dates - remember how difficult it was to keep the windshield from fogging up - not that we really cared.
Then high real estate prices and I guess, air conditioning and high tech sound forced many of them to close.

But be of good cheer, I came across an interesting news story this morning reporting that drive-in theatres are making a comeback and guess who is the driving force behind this return to the past - you got it - baby boomers and us seniors.

This past year, twenty new drive-ins opened across the US - I have no stats for Canada - but I did come across a great website that lists every drive in theatre in the Unites States and Canada, including my home outdoor movie oasis.

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A couple of interesting findings from the retirement news stat collector -

Talk about a driving force -
The American Association of Retired Persons estimates baby boomers and seniors are 78- million strong and growing at the rate of one every 8 seconds - representing nearly 50 percent of consumer spending.

You sexy, retired thing you -
A recent study conducted by Harris Interactive revealed - married men and women ages 40 to 70 when asked what was more important to a successful relationship -- health, money or sex -- sex won.

Even though 84 percent of the survey respondents said physical intimacy was more important than having enough money (72 percent) or good health (78 percent), half of them rated their intimate physical and emotional relationships as unsatisfactory, according to a recent survey

It was men (67 percent), more than women (59 percent), who said they were too tired when it came time for sex, according to the survey results.

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Retirement humor submitted by daughter-in-law Julie - THE SNOTTY RECEPTIONIST

An retired gentleman had an appointment to see the urologist who shared an office with several other doctors.
The waiting room was filled with patients.
As he approached the receptionist desk he noticed that the Receptionist was a large unfriendly woman who looked like a Sumo Wrestler.
He gave her his name.

In a very loud voice, the receptionist said, "YES, I HAVE YOUR NAME HERE; YOU WANT TO SEE THE DOCTOR ABOUT IMPOTENCE, RIGHT?"

All the patients in the waiting room snapped their heads around to look at the very embarrassed man.

He recovered quickly, and in an equally loud voice replied, "NO, I'VE COME TO INQUIRE ABOUT A SEX CHANGE OPERATION, BUT I DON'T WANT THE SAME DOCTOR THAT DID YOURS."

DON'T MESS WITH OLD FOLKS!

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My thanks to retired buddy Bernice Dini for bringing this story to my attention - especially after the wake-up call we all received yesterday with the Brits foiling another major terrorist attack -

With a year to go before it even touches the water, the Navy's amphibious assault ship USS New York has already made history.

It was built with 24 tons of scrap steel from the World Trade Center.

USS New York is about 45 percent complete and should be ready for launch in mid-2007.

It is the fifth in a new class of warship - designed for missions that include special operations against terrorists. It will carry a crew of 360 sailors and 700 combat-ready Marines to be delivered ashore by helicopters and assault craft.

When it was poured into the molds on Sept. 9, 2003, "those big rough steelworkers treated it with total reverence," recalled Navy Capt. Kevin Wensing, who was there. "It was a spiritual moment for everybody there."

The ship's motto? -'Never Forget'

According to the Associated Press, the USS New York will be the fifth ship of its class, at least two more of which will also be named for locations associated with the 9/11 attacks:

You can get more info on this story by clicking here.

Everyone have a great weekend and remember to spend some time working on your creative retirement job - (Go to URL)

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August 14, 2006 - Retirement now and later

Here I go again, wasting time wondering what the world will be like when my grandchildren reach retirement age.

If what the surveys are showing today are any indication, I envision a retirement world inhabited by communities of home-bound retirees - they will work their retirement jobs from home, be entertained at home, be informed at home, communicate with others from home and even order their groceries from home.

Personally, I find the following distressing - A Bloomberg/Los Angeles Times poll on the pop culture and entertainment habits of young people in the U.S. reveals just 9 per cent of teens aged 12 to 17 and 17 per cent of young adults aged 18 to 24 said they read a newspaper for current events. I can't image starting a day without at least scanning my morning newspapers.
Newsmagazines fared worse, with 2 per cent of both groups saying they got their news from those sources

The findings are consistent with reports about declining newspaper circulation. The Newspaper Association of America, the industry's trade group, reported in its most recent "Newspapers by the Numbers" study that 51.6 per cent of the population aged 18 and over read a daily newspaper last year, down from 58.6per cent in 1998.

By contrast, 28 per cent of the teens and 38 per cent of the young adults surveyed said they got their news from local television - the most popular source of news for young adults and the second most popular for teens after "talking with friends.

The survey also reveals that teens and young adults would rather see a movie at home - teens 35 per cent - young adults were even bigger homebodies, with 49 per cent preferring to see a movie at home - 47 per cent of teens, and almost as many young adults, 45 per cent, said they would watch a movie on a computer.

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Man, I am so retired

Back on June 29th, I listed another fun top ten list - a top ten list that proves you are of retirement age - note numbers 1 - 4 and 9 - for me 3 of 10 in just two days.

1. You're asleep, but others worry that you're dead.
2. Your back goes out more than you do.
3. You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.
4. People call at 9:00 p.m. and ask, "Did I wake you?"
5. You send money to PBS.
6. You take a metal detector to the beach.
7. Your ears are hairier than your head.
8. You talk about "good grass" and you're referring to someone's lawn.
9. You got cable for The Weather Channel.
10. You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.

Re number one - Saturday afternoon - two o'clock - I'm loafing in my recliner watching a ball game - two innings in I fall asleep - the next thing I know, there's a loud bang - Audrey had slammed a plate down on the end table - "Geez - what are you doing?"
"I wanted to see if you're all right"
"I'm just having a power nap."
You only power nap after four."

Re number four - Saturday night - 9.22PM - my son telephones - "Hope I didn't wake you but..............."

Re: number nine - This morning, I realized when I turn on the TV every morning, I'm now in the habit of clicking first to the weather channel - I am so retired.

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Can you help me?

I'm planning three new chapters to the host website one will deal with retirement recipes - if you have a favorite recipe you think would be of interest to fellow retirees I would like to hear from you - please Email me and thank you for your contribution.

Now lets get creative - (Go to URL)

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August 15, 2006 - Retirement law of believe - the memorial stone

Another Email - the same message - "I would love to build a website for a creative retirement job, but it's looks to be too complicated." - doesn't have to be, but that's another story.
Once stuck in this thought-swamp myself, I believe that many retirees and the almost retired back off because of lack of motivation - a common trait among the "getting-older" group.

Check that great online information source Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia about motivation and you get the following -

"In psychology, motivation refers to the initiation, direction, intensity and persistence of behavior (Geen, 1995)........ Motivation is having the encouragement to do something. A motivated person can be reaching for a long-term or short term goal."

If the idea of using your computer and the internet to build a creative retirement job is worrisome, ask yourself why you feel that way - sit down and write it out - then work on each point - research - find the truth - don't rely on what you think it would be like - take time for a reality check.

Once you know that Ecommerce is not as overwhelming as you thought, then - believe - believe you can face the challenge - enjoy the challenge -thrive on the challenge - experts call it the Law of belief - "whatever you believe - strongly believe - becomes your reality."

Successful people absolutely believe in themselves - they give no thought to the possibility of failure.
Granted, to embrace the law of belief may not be an easy task for those of us in our retirement years who face the physical and mental uncertainties that come with growing older, but a strong belief in ourselves can override and diminish the other age related obstacles.

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Retirement humor - my thanks to retired buddy Carole Raycraft for the following -

As the last guests departed the affair, his wife, Helen, turned to her oldest friend.
"Well, I'm sure Joe would be pleased," she said.
"I'm sure you're right," replied Jody, who lowered her voice and leaned in close.
"How much did this really cost?"
"All of it," said Helen. "Thirty thousand dollars."
"No!" Jody exclaimed. "I mean, it was very nice, but $30,000?"
Helen answered. "The funeral was $6,500. I donated $500 to the church. The wake, food and drinks were another $500. The rest went for the memorial stone."
Jody computed quickly.
"$22,500 for a memorial stone? My God, how big is it?!"

"Two and a half carats."

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Posted in a women's restroom -
A Woman's Rule of Thumb:
If it has tires or testicles,
you're going to have trouble with it.

For more retirement type chuckles - (Go to URL)

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August 16, 2006 - Copperfield flim-flam - retirement news quick clicks - new stats

Retirees - don't buy you ticket to the Bahamas just yet.

Back in the horse and buggy days they were called a flim-flam man - con artists who sold various concoctions as miracle health cures and when they claimed their mixture was from a secret Foutain of youth, old folks would hand over their money faster than your car can gulp up high priced gas - so, could this be a modern day flim-flam set-up?

Illusionist David Copperfield, who recently purchased a cluster of four tiny islands in the Bahamas for 50 mill (US) claims he found the "Fountain of Youth" on his new property.

Keep in mind that one of his islands in the Exu-ma chain, Musha Cay, is a private resort that rents for up to $300,000 a week.

Anyway, Copperfield claims property contains the legendary waters that bestow perpetual youth.
"I've discovered a true phenomenon, You can take dead leaves, they come in contact with the water and they become full of life again. Bugs or insects that are near death, come in contact with the water, they'll fly away. It's an amazing thing - very, very exciting."

He says he's hired biologists and geologists to examine the fountain's potential effect on humans.

I've been working on a new quotation mini-movie dealing with aging and when I read this Copperfield claim I remembered this quote -

Some people, no matter how old they get,
never lose their beauty -
they merely move it from their faces into their hearts.
Martin Bauxbaum

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Retirement News Quick Clicks

From redorbit.com drinking an extra can of pop each day can put on an additional 25 pounds in a year.

Wouldn't you know it - the eclectic chair was invented by a dentist - this from www.nationmaster.com

Ain't the internet a wonderful thing?

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Advance notice to Ontario based retired snowbirds - For our annual trip south, we cross at Buffalo rather than Detroit so we can spend a couple of days in the beautiful and hospitable State of Virginia to take in the beauty of the fall colours.

An Email from Virginia tourism advises that peak colors are expected in the southwestern mountains during the third and fourth weeks of October; the Piedmont and Coastal Plain are expected to peak during late October and early November.

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No surprises here, but Statistics Canada just released numbers that indicate we Canadians have a growing dependence on the Internet and are doing much more online than emailing and surfing - I'm sure it's the same in other countries, however this is the first time that Stats-Can has tracked the internet.

What these government figures prove once again - if your looking for a retirement job - think about - you - your computer - and the internet.

68 per cent of adult Canadians used the Internet for personal, non-business reasons in 2005 and in most cases they were looking for information - information you may be able to give them.
That 68% jumps to 75% in our major cities like Toronto,

Michael Geist, law professor at the University of Ottawa where he holds the Canada Research Chair in Internet and e-commerce law notes - "People increasingly identify with the Internet as an essential tool to access information and engage in all sorts of activities that only a few years ago they did offline." - get on board people - there's extra retirement income to be made here.

Now let's get working on that creative retirement job - (Go to URL)

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August 17, 2006 - Retirement news and quotes

Retirement is when you leave a life of work to start work on living. - inscribed on a decorative refrigerator door magnet purchased yesterday along with a Dixie Cup of lemonade for two bucks at Jenny's and Margaret's Lemonade and Trinket stand, located on a driveway down the street from our place.

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At the annual meeting of the American Sociological Association in Montreal earlier this week, University of Michigan sociologist Philippa Clarke, analyzing longitudinal data from the ISR Health and Retirement Study, funded by the National Institute on Aging, found that one of every five Americans age 62 and older who expected to retire early are still working.

Other findings -

• about 37 percent of people, mainly older men, had expected to take early retirement. If they ended up working beyond age 62, their life satisfaction was lower than that of retired peers with similar recent labor force activities, health, and socioeconomic and demographic factors.
• About 59 percent of people, mainly older women, had generally expected to be working after age 62. Their life satisfaction was also lower than peers who had stopped working.
• Younger and less educated respondents who tended to be ambivalent about the probability of retiring early seemed to be the one group that benefited from later-life work. This group comprised only about 4 percent of the sample. Their life satisfaction was much higher if they stayed at work past age 62.

For the study, Clarke and colleagues analyzed panel data from a representative sample of 1,044 Americans who were ages 51-61 in 1992, and who were interviewed every two years through 2004.

To assess life-satisfaction, respondents were asked to what extent they agreed with the following statements: "In most ways my life is close to ideal," "The conditions of my life are excellent," "I am satisfied with my life," "So far, I have gotten the important things I want in life," and "If I could live my life again, I would change almost nothing."

"Older workers approaching retirement have faced notable and dramatic changes in the structure of state and corporate pension plans and benefits," Clarke said.
With recent and future changes in Medicare and Social Security, she noted, older workers who have long expected to retire early are being forced to reverse their decisions and work longer than they expected.

I'm convinced that the internet will help change that trend as more 50 plus folks turn to Ecommerce to help subsidize early retirement.

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Retirement Quotes -

• Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
• The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
• Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way.
• I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
• How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
• I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
• One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.
• Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
• Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they don't recognize you.
• If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.

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A can you help me reminder

As noted several entries back, I'm planning three new chapters to the host website one will deal with retirement recipes - if you have a favorite recipe you think would be of interest to fellow retirees I would like to hear from you - please Email me and thank you for your contribution.

Now lets get creative - (Go to URL)

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August 18, 2006 - Retiree snaps at Wally Mart - Retirement News video quick clicks

I'm heading to the Ontario north country for a long weekend, so I admit I'm taking the easy way out this morning by copying material from my Inbox -

I usually wait in the car when my wife is in command of the shopping trip - but when I do venture into Wally Mart I insist on going in solo - I know exactly what I want and where to get it and then I'm the hell out of there.

Knowing this, my daughter Brenda sent me the following bit of retirement humor.

It's a joke piece folks but you could see a retired guy snapping from too many Wally Mart trips -

When Mrs. Toombs1 husband recently retired he would accompanied her whenever she went shopping.
Not long after he started to go with her on a regular basis she received the following letter from Wal-Mart.

Dear Mrs. Toombs,
Over the past six months, your husband, Mr. Albert Toombs has been causing quite a commotion in our store.
We realize he is in his senior years, but we cannot tolerate this type of behaviour and have considered banning the entire family from shopping in any of our stores.

We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment.
Three of our clerks are attending counseling from the trouble your husband has caused.
All complaints against Mr. Toombs have been compiled and are listed below.

Mr. Wally Zimbrowski, Wal-Mart Complaint Department MEMO: Re: Mr. Albert Toombs - Complaints -15 Things Mr. Toombs has done while his spouse is shopping:

• June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
• July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
• July 7: Made a trail of pineapple juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
• July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, Code 3' in house wares and watched what happened.
• August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
• September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
• September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
• September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
• October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.
• November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
• December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible" theme.
• December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
• December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
• December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"
• (And; last, but not least!) December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door and waited a while then, yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

Ya gotta love the old retired guys who just don't give a damn any more.

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And then this arrives in my "Inbox" - here I am, an old(er)guy slowly, but happily, working away with my simple Quotation Slide Shows using a software that my 16 year old neighbour can manipulate blindfolded and my son Gord Emails me this site - obviously to remind me what an amateur I am.

This is great stuff - the creator of this special feature - Jacquie Lawson - has built a real niche internet business with her imaginative greeting cards.
Looking at her website picture, Jacquie appears too young for our retirement club, but with her talent this endeavour will certainly take her into and through retirement.
But Jacquie created this one as a special card to salute those who serve in the American military and also promote her site which I am happy to do - take a look.

Everyone have a great weekend - (Go to URL)

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August 21, 2006 - Retirement news notebook - retire rich and healthy

A few offerings scribbled in the Retirement news notebook while touring the web -

As an eBay Power Seller myself, I acknowledge that eBay is a great retirement job, but there are limits.
While reading a review of the book - "The Grilled Cheese Madonna and 99 other of the Weirdest, Wackiest, Most Famous eBay Auctions Ever" - I learned that someone in California (wouldn't you know) attempted to auction off one used Grandma.

The description of granny noted that the dear old gal came with her own coffin, her own dentures, was still healthy even though she has lived through two world wars

The starting bid was only ten bucks.
By the time the eBay people pulled the plug on the granny ad - the bidding had reached seven figures - As much as you may want to, you just can't sell old folks or any folks on eBay.

While on the subject of grandmas - retired friends Craig and Cathy Olson sent me a series of - grandkids say the darndest things - example

After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair.
As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin.
At last she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings.
As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"

One of my favourite regular web stops is the the BBC site from their health page the following - "After four years in a relationship, less than half of the 30 year old women want regular sex - a German study shows that a man's libido, on the other hand, remains the same no matter how long he's been in a relationship." - I can't explain why I thought that interesting.

As a sports fan - watching not playing - I keep suggesting that a basketball game should be only ten minutes in duration - that's the most exciting part the game the way it's played now - the rest of the time is just a bunch of tall guys running back and forth - lets do an edit.

Anyway, for the purest among you - a little trivia - the shot clock in basketball is 24 seconds long because a team owner once calculated that a well paced game featured 60 shots by each side, or 120 in total.
He divided that number into the number of seconds in the 48 minutes game - 2,880 - and came up with 24 - this from snopes.com

Retired buddy Denice Dini sent me site - great pictures if into military type stuff - a U.S Navy presentation.

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Rich retirees get richer in more ways than one.

According to a new study published in the New England Journal of Medicine, it's not just purchasing power that older people with more money enjoy - the richer you are the healthier you are

This study, co authoured by University of Toronto social work professor Esme Fuller-Thomson and sponsored by the U.S. National Institute on Aging, in collaboration with the University of Toronto and the University of California, Berkeley, is based on Americans ages 55 to 84, and reveals wealthier seniors have an easier time walking, carrying, reaching, lifting objects and climbing stairs than those with less money.
Professor Fuller-Thomson says this study backs earlier Canadian studies on the same subject.

The highest income category used in the analysis - 700 per cent or more of the U.S. poverty line - began at $57,813 for an older adult living alone and $124,327 for a four-person household.

What's interesting about these findings, is the fact that the health difference registers at every economic level - "The discrepancy between poorest and richest is huge," says Fuller-Thomson, "but even very high up the spectrum, the richer are doing better than the people just one step down but why would the top 75th percentile be worse off than the 85th percentile?" she wonders. "If it was just health, housing and nutrition, one wouldn't expect any difference between them."

But York University professor and health policy researcher Dennis Raphael explains, "It reflects a lifetime of lived experience. And each step in income represents a difference in lived experience.

Why should money make a difference in climbing stairs?
"We've known for a long time that people at the low end of the socio-economic spectrum do much more poorly health-wise than people at the higher end," explains senior author Dr. Jack Guralnik, chief of the NIA Laboratory of Epidemiology, Demography and Biometry - "And many chronic conditions - heart disease, arthritis - can have an impact on functioning, strength and balance."

He was surprised to find, however, that differences in functioning were reported even at the uppermost incremental levels of income.

Now let's get to work on our creative retirement job and earn some additional revenue - (Go to URL)

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August 22, 2006 - From retired friends - retirement humor contributions

Retired Florida friend Dan Dombroski sent the following golf jokes so retirees can have some new material while playing the 19th hole -

Police are called to an apartment and find an elderly woman holding a bloody 5-iron standing over a lifeless man.
The detective! Asks, "Ma'am, is that your husband?"
"Yes" says the woman.
"Did you hit him with that golf club?"
"Yes, yes, I did."
The woman begins to sob, drops the club, and puts her, hands on her face.
"How many times did you hit him?"
"I don't know, five, six, maybe seven times.....just put me down for a five."

A retired minister teed up his ball on the first tee, took a mighty swing and hit his ball into a clump of trees.
He found his ball and saw an opening between two trees he thought he could hit through.
Taking out his 3-wood, he took another mighty swing; the ball hit a tree, bounced back, hit him in the forehead and killed him.
As he approached the gates of Heaven, St. Peter saw him coming and asked, "Are you a good golfer", to which the minister replied: "Got here in two, didn't I?"

A young man and a retired priest are playing together.
At a short par-3 the priest asks, "What are you going to use on this hole my son?"
The young man says, "An 8-iron, Father. How about you?"
The priest says, "I'm going to hit a soft seven and pray."
The young man hits his 8-iron and puts the ball on the green.
The priest tops his 7-iron and dribbles the ball out a few yards.
The young man says, "I don't know about you father, but in my church when we pray, we keep our head down."

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My thanks to retired buddy Jim Hill for the following notes on retirement -

• Question: How many days in a week?
  Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday
• Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
  Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.
• Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb?
  Answer: Only one, but it might take all day.
• Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
  Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.
• Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
  Answer: The term comes with a 10% percent discount.
• Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
  Answer: Tied shoes.
• Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
  Answer: They are the only ones who have the time.
• Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
  Answer: NUTS!
• Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
  Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.
• Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
  Answer: Normal.
• Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?
  Answers: The never ending Coffee Break.
• Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
  Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.
• Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with?
  Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth.
• Share this one with all the retirees that you know. I'm sure they can relate to some of them! AND, If you have not yet retired, look what you have to look forward to....

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  Thanks Denice for this one -

  A census taker in a rural area went up to a farmhouse and knocked.
  When an elderly woman came to the door, he asked her how many children she had and their ages.
  She said, "Les' see now, there's the twins, Sally and Billy, they're thirty-two. And the twins, Seth & Beth, they're twenty-six. And the twins, Penny and Jenny, they're twenty-four .. "
  "Hold on!" said the census taker, "Did you get twins EVERY time?"
  The woman answered, "Heck no, there were hundreds of times we didn't get nothin."

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  Thanks to retired friends and dog track companions Craig and Cathy Olson for the following -

  A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in th e ! woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"

  My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while I asked,"No, how are we alike? "You're both old," he replied.

  Everyone have a happy day and keep on laughing - (Go to URL)

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August 23, 2006 - Retirement News - Connect2Canada

Sadly, no retirement news items today - only one item - unfortunately I had to change the "war on terror" honour roll numbers on the Connect2Canada page of the home website.

Yesterday, just 700 meters outside the fortified Canadian camp in Kandahar City, a suicide bomber plowed his explosives-laden car into a returning convoy killing Corp. David Braun, of the second battalion, Princess Patricia's Canadian Light Infantry - three others were wounded.

Twenty-seven Canadian soldiers have been killed since Canada deployed ground forces to the country in early 2002.

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They are dead; but they live in each Patriot's breast,
And their names are engraven on honor's bright crest.
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

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Last night, while reporting on this incident, our local television station featured a follow-up story on how, regardless of the recent casualties, armed forces recruitment in our area is up more than 46% over last year.
Also, a large percentage of these new recruits, are in their thirties and early fourties.
Interviews revealed some were motivated by wanting a career change - others wanting to contribute in the fight against terrorism.

More than 18,500 troops make up ISAF, with contributions from 36 nations.
To learn more about the NATO force make-up and mission - click here for their official web site.

Honor to the soldier, and Sailor everywhere , who bravely bears his country's cause,
Honor also to the citizen who cares for his brother in the field, and serves, as he best can, the same cause.
(Abraham Lincoln)

(Go to URL)

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August 24, 2006 - Retirement job in the nude?

A comedian, performing at the Laugh In comedy festival in Montreal, offered some advise to parents who had children 25 years of age or older, still living at home.

Start walking around the house nude - that he said, would send the offspring out of the house and into their own apartment faster than a gas leak.

I remembered that bit after reading an item in the Regina Leader-Post about a recent North American Poll indicating - "a substantial number of people, working from home, do so in the nude."

I want to emphasize right from the get-go I'm not talking about myself here - my computer station is by a window and there's a Baptist Church across the street - you can just image.

Anyway, this newspaper item didn't breakdown the who, why or how old of this "substantial number" of computer nudies, but when you couple this with the latest Pew Global Attitudes poll, it could be the majority are retired, approaching retirement, equally divided by gender, and - are you ready - Canadian.

In each of the 13 countries for which historical comparisons can be made, computer use is accelerating faster than ever before and the increase in internet access has been greater among 50-64 year olds, averaging nearly 20 percentage points for that age group in Western Europe, the U.S. and Canada.
Steady but slower increase in internet use was registered among those 65 and older.

Still, men use computers more than women in 14 of 16 countries surveyed; only in Canada - 79% to 79% do the genders share the same amount of computer activity. (U.S. is 77% men - 75% women)

Now there's a frightening picture for your theatre of the mind - thousands of nude retirees sitting at computers - but hey, as long as the curtains are closed and the kids have left home let it flop.

The fact is one of the perks of working your retirement job at home, by using your computer and the internet, is setting your own dress code - or no dress code if you don't mind your bottom sticking to the leather chair - it's a do-your-own-thing - thing.

Another perk, at least for me, is the musical background of your choice - as I write this, I'm listening to Ella Fitzgerald with Teddy Wilson, singing Melancholy Baby - 1936 I think - God bless XM satellite radio's channels four and five.

And while I was researching for additional poll results, I came across the following American survey, again from Pew Global Attitudes -

• Married people are happier than unmarrieds
• People who worship frequently are happier than those who don't.
• Republicans are happier than Democrats.
• Whites and Hispanics are happier than blacks.
• Sunbelt residents are happier than those who live in the rest of the United States.
• People who have children are no happier than those who don't.
• Retirees are no happier than workers.
• Pet owners are no happier than those without pets.

So whether you have your pants on or off - time to get working on your home based retirement job using your computer and the internet and may I suggest you take the time to download and read this free manual on how to get started - it worked for me - (Go to URL)

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August 25, 2006 - A retirement slide show - the retired guy - retirement job questionnaire

Regular visitors to this weekday retirement news journal, know that the Quotation Movies chapter on the home website, was inspired by and is dedicated to my daughter Cynthia Anne Marie who always searched for the "Good and Beautiful" - as explained in this Blog entry - In Search of the Good and Beautiful.

I've just collected a new group of outstanding nature photographs and combined them with inspiring quotations in a PowerPoint slide show that reinforces the fact growing older is a reward not a liability - IF we live our lives to the fullest and, as Cindy promoted, take the time to search for the good and beautiful in people and our surroundings.

Download this new presentation and Email to those you think could use a "growing older pick-me-up."

It's a PowerPoint presentation - In case you don't have one installed on your computer - click here to download your free PP viewer from Microsoft.

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I'm too chicken for this action, but check out this headline -
Aging baby boomers going for big, pricey motorcycles

Honda says sales of their 1,300cc CB1300 series motorcycles jumped 40% over last year and just under half of the people who are buying the machines are age 40 to 60.
As a result, Honda and other bike manufacturers are developing new models targeted at retiring baby boomers who want to cruise with their spouses.

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Did you hear the one about the older, white haired, retired guy who walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his side.
He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend.
The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring and showed it to him. The old retired guy said, "I don't think you understand, I want something very special."
At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over.
"Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000" the jeweler said.

The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement.
The old retired guy seeing this said, "We'll take it."
The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old retired guy stated, by check." I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon," he said.

Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old man.
"There's no money in that account."
"I know," said the old retired guy, "but can you imagine the weekend I had?"

Don't mess with old retired guys.

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While researching for retirement job material for the home website, I came across a questionnaire designed by a group of counselors, headhunters and psychological testing experts for folks who are planning a mid-life job change.
With some minor changes and editing, I thought it could be a help to those nearing retirement or already retired, who are thinking about setting up a home based retirement job via your computer and the internet.

1. Do you need to work or is it a choice? Is it for money, for fun , a hobby?
2. How do you see yourself working? Is it part time? Full time? Seasonal?
3. What kind of retirement lifestyle do you want? Lots of travel? Living well? Helping other people? Time with family? How does this retirement job fit in with that lifestyle?
4. Do you want responsibility, or are you trying to eliminate stress?
5. Do you have the skills that will enable you to move in the direction you want? If not, are you willing to take the time to learn?
6. Do you have an interest or hobby that could become a revenue generator?
7. Can you draw on existing relationships - work, family, professional - for help?

Once you set yourself a retirement job assignment, take time to research - do your homework and remember - Ecommerce can be frustrating at times but it's mentally stimulating and as you grow older that's a major plus - remember also it's not a fast track to riches - it takes time - remember the tortoise and the hare.

Everyone have a great weekend - (Go to URL)

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August 28, 2006 - Retirement Notes

While researching for quotations dealing with health of mind and body, I came across this quotation worthy of being posted on every retiree's bathroom mirror to serve as a "first-thing-in-the -morning reminder -

"The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, not to worry about the future, or not to anticipate troubles, but to live the present moment wisely and earnestly." - Buddha

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A note to all retirees who, like me, have become download addicts - it's just that at my age, I wish they would hurry up.

The Wall Street Journal tech columnist, Lee Gomes, reports that in seven years, "you will have a terabytes of storage" - a terabyte is a trillion bytes - "you'll be collecting movies and archiving video on your hard drive"

Sounds great - but it's the seven years that worries me.

For the record. it was back in 1956 the first drive disk was introduced - weighed one ton and had a five megabyte capacity, enough for maybe five minutes of music.

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Make a Life Plan, Then Retire

Those of us already in the retirement club, should pass this on to our kids and grandchildren - retirement planning is more than financial, there's also creative considerations, as covered on the host website, as well as lifestyle considerations.

Dorothy W. Cantor, author of What Do You Want To Do When You Grow Up? says that too many people don't start thinking about it until they're about to take the plunge. The time to start planning is in your 50s.

Creative retirement expert Ron Manheimer, notes - "People have fantasies about what they're going to do without understanding the reality. They'll say things like, 'I'm going to get into art,' only to find it's much harder work than they expected."

So warn those who follow to research well before retirement and have a good idea of what their creative and lifestyle goals will be well before they join our retirement club.

For the already retired, who, like myself, did not plan for the creative side of retirement, remember, it's never too late - you have years of experience and knowledge to pass on to a world-wide market.

You + Your Computer + the Internet = A retirement Job, offering a creative challenge that will make your life more interesting the longer you live.

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Thanks to retired buddy, Jim Hill for the following - A quick way to end retirement

A retired couple were getting ready for bed.
The wife, standing nude, looks in the bedroom mirror and says to her retired husband, "I look horrible, I feel fat and ugly. Pay me a compliment".
The husband replies, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect".

He never heard the shot............

Now let's get creative - (Go to URL)

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August 29, 2006 - Retirement Recipes - Fast Eddie and Butch

Just published the first page of the newest chapter on the home website - Retirement recipes - easy-to-make recipes for retirees from retirees to help spice-up a senior's menu.

I had to lead-off with one of my personal favourites - that All-Canadian classic - Beaver Tail pastry - guaranteed to clog your arteries on contact, but its a WOW treat.
My thanks to all contributors - I'll have page two ready in a few days - if you have a retirement recipe to pass on, use the form at the bottom of this page and thank you.

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My thanks to retired Florida friend Dan Dombroski for Emailing the following stories. -

STORY NUMBER ONE

MANY YEARS AGO, AL CAPONE VIRTUALLY OWNED CHICAGO. CAPONE WASN'T FAMOUS FOR ANYTHING HEROIC.
HE WAS NOTORIOUS FOR ENMESHING THE WINDY CITY IN EVERYTHING FROM BOOTLEGGED BOOZE AND PROSTITUTION TO MURDER.

CAPONE HAD A LAWYER NICKNAMED "EASY EDDIE." HE WAS HIS LAWYER FOR A GOOD REASON. EDDIE WAS VERY GOOD! IN FACT, EDDIE'S SKILL AT LEGAL MANEUVERING KEPT BIG AL OUT OF JAIL FOR A LONG TIME.

TO SHOW HIS APPRECIATION, CAPONE PAID HIM VERY WELL.
NOT ONLY WAS THE MONEY BIG, BUT ALSO , EDDIE GOT SPECIAL DIVIDENDS. FOR INSTANCE, HE AND HIS FAMILY OCCUPIED A FENCED-IN MANSION WITH LIVE-IN HELP AND ALL OF THE CONVENIENCES OF THE DAY. THE ESTATE WAS SO LARGE THAT IT FILLED AN ENTIRE CHICAGO CITY BLOCK.

EDDIE LIVED THE HIGH LIFE OF THE CHICAGO MOB AND GAVE LITTLE CONSIDERATION TO THE ATROCITY THAT WENT ON AROUND HIM.
EDDIE DID HAVE ONE SOFT SPOT, HOWEVER. HE HAD A SON THAT HE LOVED DEARLY. EDDIE SAW TO IT THAT HIS YOUNG SON HAD CLOTHES, CARS, AND A GOOD EDUCATION. NOTHING WAS WITHHELD. PRICE WAS NO OBJECT. AND, DESPITE HIS INVOLVEMENT WITH ORGANIZED CRIME,EDDIE EVEN TRIED TO TEACH HIM RIGHT FROM WRONG.
EDDIE WANTED HIS SON TO BE A BETTER MAN THAN HE WAS. YET, WITH ALL HIS WEALTH AND INFLUENCE, THERE WERE TWO THINGS HE COULDN'T GIVE HIS SON; HE COULDN'T PASS ON A GOOD NAME OR A GOOD EXAMPLE.

ONE DAY, EASY EDDIE REACHED A DIFFICULT DECISION. EASY EDDIE WANTED TO RECTIFY WRONGS HE HAD DONE. HE DECIDED HE WOULD GO TO THE AUTHORITIES AND TELL THE TRUTH ABOUT AL "SCARFACE" CAPONE, CLEAN UP HIS TARNISHED NAME, AND OFFER HIS SON SOME SEMBLANCE OF INTEGRITY.
TO DO THIS, HE WOULD HAVE TO TESTIFY AGAINST THE MOB, AND HE KNEW THAT THE COST WOULD BE GREAT.
HE TESTIFIED - WITHIN THE YEAR, EASY EDDIE'S LIFE ENDED IN A BLAZE OF GUNFIRE ON A LONELY CHICAGO STREET.
BUT IN HIS EYES, HE HAD GIVEN HIS SON THE GREATEST GIFT HE HAD TO OFFER, AT THE GREATEST PRICE HE COULD EVER PAY.

POLICE REMOVED FROM HIS POCKETS A ROSARY, A CRUCIFIX, A RELIGIOUS MEDALLION, AND A POEM CLIPPED FROM A MAGAZINE. THE POEM READ:

THE CLOCK OF LIFE IS WOUND BUT ONCE,
AND NO MAN HAS THE POWER TO TELL JUST WHEN THE HANDS WILL STOP AT LATE OR EARLY HOUR.
NOW IS THE ONLY TIME YOU OWN.
LIVE, LOVE, TOIL WITH A WILL.
PLACE NO FAITH IN TIME FOR THE CLOCK MAY SOON BE STILL.

STORY NUMBER TWO

WORLD WAR II PRODUCED MANY HEROES. ONE SUCH MAN WAS LIEUTENANT COMMANDER BUTCH O'HARE. HE WAS A FIGHTER PILOT ASSIGNED TO THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER LEXINGTON IN THE SOUTH PACIFIC.

ONE DAY HIS ENTIRE SQUADRON WAS SENT ON A MISSION. AFTER HE WAS AIRBORNE, HE LOOKED AT HIS FUEL GAUGE AND REALIZED THAT SOMEONE HAD FORGOTTEN TO TOP OFF HIS FUEL TANK. HE WOULD NOT HAVE ENOUGH FUEL TO COMPLETE HIS MISSION AND GET BACK TO HIS SHIP.

HIS FLIGHT LEADER TOLD HIM TO RETURN TO THE CARRIER. RELUCTANTLY, HE DROPPED OUT OF FORMATION AND HEADED BACK TO THE FLEET.
AS HE WAS RETURNING TO THE MOTHER SHIP HE SAW SOMETHING THAT TURNED HIS BLOOD COLD: A SQUADRON OF JAPANESE AIRCRAFT WERE SPEEDING THEIR WAY TOWARD THE AMERICAN FLEET.
THE AMERICAN FIGHTERS WERE GONE ON A SORTIE, AND THE FLEET WAS ALL BUT DEFENSELESS. HE COULDN'T REACH HIS SQUADRON AND BRING THEM BACK IN TIME TO SAVE THE FLEET. NOR COULD HE WARN THE FLEET OF THE APPROACHING DANGER.

LAYING ASIDE ALL THOUGHTS OF PERSONAL SAFETY HE DOVE INTO THE FORMATION OF JAPANESE PLANES.
WING-MOUNTED 50 CALIBERS BLAZED AS HE CHARGED IN, ATTACKING ONE SURPRISED ENEMY PLANE AND THEN ANOTHER.

BUTCH WOVE IN AND OUT OF THE NOW BROKEN FORMATION AND FIRED AT AS MANY PLANES AS POSSIBLE UNTIL ALL HIS AMMUNITION WAS FINA LLY SPENT.

UNDAUNTED, HE CONTINUED THE ASSAULT. HE DOVE AT THE PLANES, TRYING TO CLIP A WING OR TAIL IN HOPES OF DAMAGING AS MANY ENEMY PLANES AS POSSIBLE AND RENDERING THEM UNFIT TO FLY.

FINALLY, THE EXASPERATED JAPANESE SQUADRON TOOK OFF IN ANOTHER DIRECTION.
DEEPLY RELIEVED, BUTCH O'HARE AND HIS TATTERED FIGHTER LIMPED BACK TO THE CARRIER. UPON ARRIVAL, HE REPORTED IN AND RELATED THE EVENT SURROUNDING HIS RETURN.
THE FILM FROM THE GUN-CAMERA MOUNTED ON HIS PLANE TOLD THE TALE. IT SHOWED THE EXTENT OF BUTCH'S DARING ATTEMPT TO PROTECT HIS FLEET. HE HAD, IN FACT, DESTROYED FIVE ENEMY AIRCRAFT.

THIS TOOK PLACE ON FEBRUARY 20, 1942, AND FOR THAT ACTION BUTCH BECAME THE NAVY'S FIRST ACE OF W.W.II, AND THE FIRST NAVAL AVIATOR TO WIN THE CONGRESSIONAL MEDAL OF HONOR.
A YEAR LATER BUTCH WAS KILLED IN AERIAL COMBAT AT THE AGE OF 29.

HIS HOME TOWN WOULD NOT ALLOW THE MEMORY OF THIS WW II HERO TO FADE, AND TODAY, O'HARE AIRPORT I N CHICAGO IS NAMED IN TRIBUTE TO THE COU RAGE OF THIS GREAT MAN.

SO, THE NEXT TIME YOU FIND YOURSELF AT O'HARE INTERNATIONAL, GIVE SOME THOUGHT TO VISITING BUTCH'S MEMORIAL DISPLAYING HIS STATUE AND HIS MEDAL OF HONOR. IT'S LOCATED BETWEEN TERMINALS 1 AND 2.

SO WHAT DO THESE TWO STORIES HAVE TO DO WITH EACH OTHER?

BUTCH O'HARE WAS "EASY EDDIE'S" SON.

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August 30, 2006 - Retirement warning and statistics

Life is no brief candle to me.
It is sort of a splendid torch which I have got hold of for a moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible
before handing it on to future generations.
George Bernard Shaw

First, as part of the Connect2Canada chapter on the host website just a quick reminder to retired Canadians heading south during the hurricane season - be sure to copy the following telephone numbers for the Governments Emergency Operations Centre -1-800-267-6788 (from the United States or Canada) or 613-996-8885, which operates 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and accepts emergency collect calls from Canadians requiring assistance abroad.

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And while on the subject emergency situations, we all learned from Katrina that citizens can't necessarily count on government and relief organizations for immediate help in disasters, especially big ones.
Back in 54, Hurricane Hazel took a big chunk out of southern Ontario, including the southern half of my home city, so you have to be prepared regardless of where you live.

However, officials say few retirees have a home survival kit.

Here's what they recommend you should always have on hand, just in case. -

• At least four litres of water per person per day, half for drinking and half for personal hygiene and dish washing.
• Canned food such as stews, soups, meats, fish, vegetables and fruit - and a can opener.
• Ready-to-eat foods that don't require refrigeration such as crackers, honey, peanut butter.
• Disposable plates, cutlery and cups.
• A pocket knife, flashlight and batteries, radio, first-aid kit, waterproof matches, toilet paper
• clothing and footwear needed for the season.

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OK ladies we know you outlive us guys but this new stat makes it a whole new ballgame.

More people are living past 100 than ever before and most of them are female - the ladies are outliving men aged 100 years old (or more) by nearly 80 per cent.

Census Canada's 2001 report (latest available) revealed that out of 3,795 people aged 100 or more, 3,055 were women and 740 were men.

Globally, women accounted for 85 per cent of the total number of people who lived to be 100 years and older.

But while theories abound on how to extend your life in those golden years, there is no medically founded recipe for longevity.

As noted in a previous retirement news entry, I'm hoping for seven more years just so I can order one of those hard drives with a terabytes of storage - a terabyte is a trillion bytes - looks like my wife has a better chance.

Trivia - According to the Guinness Book of World Records, the current title holder of oldest person in the world is Elizabeth Bolden of Memphis, Tenn., at 116.

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Aspire to inspire before you expire.

An elderly retired gentleman went to the local drug store and asked the pharmacist for the little blue "Viagra" pill.
The pharmacist asked "How many?"
The man replied, "Just a few, maybe a half dozen. I cut each one into four pieces."
The pharmacist said, "That's too small a dose. That won't get you through intimacy.

The old fellow said, "Oh, I'm past Sixty-five years old and I don't even think about intimacy much anymore. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don't pee on my new golf shoes.

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August 31, 2006 - Retirement flashback - I don't remember it that way

Based on many years of experience in dealing with the opposite sex, many male retirees just shook their heads in disbelief when Michael Noer, a senior editor with Forbes.com, wrote the following -

Guys: A word of advice. Marry pretty women or ugly ones. Short ones or tall ones. Blondes or brunettes. Just, whatever you do, don't marry a woman with a career.
While everyone knows that marriage can be stressful, recent studies have found professional women are more likely to get divorced, more likely to cheat, less likely to have children and, if they do have kids, they are more likely to be unhappy about it."

You just knew the feathers would hit the fan - Forbes, who received a slew of furious protests, immediately distanced themselves from Mike who obviously has some kind of death wish.

Now a retirement flashback - I have received several Emails from female visitors to this Retirement news journal forwarding an article from Good Housekeeping Magazine - May 13, 1955.

You will note that some of the copy has been underlined by several women who also added remarks to the Emails such as - "Can you believe this B------t?"

This is the actual ad -

This is the text -

The good wife's guide

• Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.
• Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
• Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
• Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives
• Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper etc., then run a dust cloth over the tables
• Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will fill you with immense personal satisfaction.
• Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (If they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part- Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.
• Be happy lo see him.
• Greet him with a warn smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
• Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
• Make the evening his. Never complain if comes home late or goes out for sinner or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be home and relax.
• Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.
• Don't greet him with complaints and problems.
• Don't complain if he comes home late for dinner or even stays out all night.Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.
• make him comfortable. Have him lean back In a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a warm or cool drink ready for him.
• Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
• Don't ask him about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the home and as always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to good question him.
• A good wife always knows her place.

Is this for real? You sure can't prove it by me - May 13, 1955 - Audrey and I would have been married for three years, one month and eight days and I know for a fact that Audrey never read this article - I know because -

1. I don't remember being whacked on the back of the head by a rolled-up copy of Good Housekeeping
2. I certainly don't remember any fluffed up pillows, the lowering of household noises or pre dinner naps on the sofa when I arrived home from work.
3. And I sure as hell don't remember any - "It's OK darling for you to stay out all night playing poker with those newsroom deadbeats."
   But I do remember a number of occasions when some wife-whipped poker buddy would whimper - "Damn, it's 3am, I'm in big trouble." (pause) "Ah, what the hell, I'm going to get it with both barrels anyway so I might as well make it worth the hassle - deal."

So, is this GH copy for real? Maybe - but not in my world - then or now.

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